


How to Date A Slytherin

by Reddhg87



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Break Up, Conflict, F/M, Family Drama, First Time, Loss of Virginity, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Harm, some dirty talk
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-10
Updated: 2019-11-05
Packaged: 2020-01-11 05:18:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 45,604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18423651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Reddhg87/pseuds/Reddhg87
Summary: Following the war the need for stability runs deep among those who survived. The return to Hogwarts for 7th year has not brought about the changes that were hoped for. Ron longs for a normal relationship with Hermione. He fails, however, to see her inability to cope with everything that happened. The only person that can relate to her is her fellow Head, Draco Malfoy. However, Draco is suffering through his own identity crisis. The life of a Death Eater was not what he expected. He wants to pick up the pieces of his life, yet he realizes that he cannot do it alone. And the only person willing to help him, the only person that can, is the muggle-born witch he was raised to hate. But will grow to love.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story will be slightly non-canon as Dumbledore, Snape, Lupin, Tonks, and Fred are all alive. Also, because as the title suggests, Draco and Hermione eventually get together.

Hermione felt a smile pull at the corners of her mouth as she followed Ron, Harry, and Ginny through King's Cross to the hidden entrance for Platform 9 ¾. Harry and Ginny went first, slipping through the wall between Platforms 9 and 10, then she and Ron followed. A wave of emotions washed over her when she looked up at the scarlet steam engine now in front of her. Nostalgia, excitement, sadness, anticipation. She, Harry, Ron, and Ginny were returning to Hogwarts to complete their seventh and final year of education. She fully intended on taking her N.E.W.T.s next year, and she knew Harry did as well, so going back to acquire the knowledge that they lost out on in the last year was essential.

Hermione followed her three companions on to the train and walked with them towards the back where there were bound to be empty compartments still. Ron gave her a confused look when she didn't immediately stow her trunk on the luggage rack and sit down.

"Aren't you joining us?" he asked.

"She can't," Ginny interjected as she sat down. "She's Head Girl, remember? She has to go up front."

"Oh, right." Ron didn't sound particularly pleased about it, but he finished stowing his trunk and sat down. "You sure you can't stay just for the beginning of the ride?"  
"I have to meet the Head Boy up front, Ron, and help hand out the assignments for the Prefects. You know this."

"Just thought you might want to spend to some time with your boyfriend is all." Ron muttered as he grabbed the Quidditch magazine he had left out of his trunk and stuck his nose in it.

Hermione gave him a disbelieving look, but turned in the compartment doorway to leave. She had barely pulled her trunk through into the narrow hall when she felt Ron's hand close around her wrist. She turned back to him to see an apologetic look in his eyes as he stood up.

He followed her out into the hall and shut the compartment door. "I'm sorry, 'Mione. I didn't mean that. I know you have responsibilities up front. But…maybe later you can come back here and spend some time with us?" He held her hand and ran his thumb over the back of it.

Hermione felt her heart soften a little and offered Ron a smile. He returned it, then leaned in and kissed her firmly but sweetly, wrapping one arm around her waist to squeeze her. Hermione did not know how she felt about the amount of pressure he was applying or that his hand slipped to her backside. She pulled away, breaking the kiss and shoved his hand away.

"Ron, I told you I don't like that."

"What's wrong with it? I'm just touching you."

"It's the way you're touching me."

"Come on, Hermione, don't be such a prude."

"I'll see you later, Ronald." She grabbed the handle of her trunk and turned, dragging it behind her as she walked away.

Ron watched her go and waved her off with an amused smile. She would come around eventually. When he reentered the cabin, both Harry and Ginny were giving him disapproving looks. "What?" he asked with a shrug as he sat down and pulled his magazine back into his lap.

"That was unnecessary." his sister told him.

"What was?" Ron asked again with a shrug.

"Grabbing Hermione like that. I know if Harry if ever did that to me in front of someone else, I would hex his bollocks off."

Ron watched Harry throw a fearful look at his girlfriend. "You wouldn't seriously, would you? I need them, you know."

"If you ever grabbed my ass like that in public, yes, I would, Harry Potter. Don't doubt me. I don't mind a little groping behind closed doors, but not in view of other people. It's demeaning."

"Right. I'll bear that in mind."

Ginny leaned over and kissed his cheek. "I'm going to find Luna. I'll be back later."

Ron watched his sister go from behind his magazine. As soon as the compartment door was shut, he put it down. "You don't think what I did was wrong do you?"

"Not in terms of being in a relationship with her, no. But doing it in front of me and Ginny, yes."

"Come on, Harry, how many times this summer did you and Ginny snog in view of everyone?"

"Plenty, but never indecently. There's a difference between displaying affection and being crude. What you did to Hermione was crude. And offensive." Harry leaned back in his seat, staring out the window. "I'm not trying to pick on you, Ron, but you have been pressuring her a lot lately for things that she's not ready for. You're her first real boyfriend. The only experience you had before Hermione was with Lavender Brown, and even you said that was purely chemical. A lot happened between you two very quickly, and you can't approach your relationship with Hermione the same way. She's not that kind of girl. She doesn't want to spend hours snogging your lips off."

"What does she want? Because it seems like every time I ask her to do something with me she's not ready, or doesn't want to at that moment. She had an excuse for everything this summer."

Harry sighed to himself. He wished he could make Ron understand that just because the war was over, and Voldemort was gone, did not mean the world was going to go back to the way it was overnight. They could not act as though their lives were perfectly normal again. It wasn't that simple. They had all been affected by everything that happened. It was not something you could just forget about and go on with your life as though nothing had ever occurred.

Hermione had been tortured and cursed. As far as Harry could tell she had recovered physically. The cut on her arm had healed, but the scar would never fade. She had worn nothing but long sleeves since that night at Malfoy Manor. Mentally, however, he could not know if she would ever be the same again. There was a light missing from her eyes these days. She didn't talk as much, nor did she like being in groups of people, preferring to spend most of her time alone.

"You need to give her a break, Ron. We all went through a lot. Hermione more so. She took it upon herself to keep us alive while we were on the run. I don't know about you, but I didn't tell her how grateful I was as much as I should have. Not that she was looking for thanks, but it may have made a difference somehow."

"S'pose you're right," Ron muttered. Harry didn't know if he was agreeing with the fact that he had acted like a Neanderthal to Hermione, or that he could have done more in the past year to show his gratitude for her.

Ron returned to his magazine, assuming the conversation was now over. He didn't know if he agreed with Harry, but he would at least put some thought into what his friend said. There were things he wanted with Hermione. To do with her. He had tried at least half a dozen times to broach the subject with her, and she shut him down every time. It seemed like she wasn't interested. Or she wasn't interested in _him_.

Maybe he did need to rethink his approach. Harry was right. Hermione wasn't the same as other girls. He couldn't treat her the same as he had Lavender. But if he could just get Hermione to see how good it was, how good it would make her feel, perhaps she would come around.

Ron decided to give her a break for now, but he began to devise a plan to show her just how much fun they could have together. He knew he would have to get her alone since she seemed to be more anxious in front of other people. He would go slow, but in the end, he knew Hermione would feel the same way he did.

# ~~S~~

_A prude? Was Ron serious?_

Hermione replayed the scene in her head as she marched down the train to the Prefects compartment. The Head Boy and Girl had their own small compartment at the end. Once inside, she stowed her trunk, pulled on her Gryffindor robes, and attached her Head Girl badge over the Gryffindor crest. She then sat on one of the padded benches, setting a book down on the table and began to read.

When the compartment door opened she did not bother to look up right away, being in the middle of a paragraph.

"I guess I shouldn't be surprised. I knew it would be you, Granger," stated an all too familiar drawling voice, edged with sarcasm and amusement.

Hermione felt her eyes widen in shock and looked up to see Draco Malfoy standing in the doorway, arms crossed over his chest. He was already changed into his robes as well, his Head Boy badge pinned above the Slytherin Crest. Draco looked completely at ease, the exact opposite of what he had been the last two years. She noticed that his face had filled back out, he had gained back the weight he lost when under the stress of being a Death Eater. His cheekbones were still prominent, but he had lost that severely angular look of someone who had lost a lot of weight in a short amount of time.

_What the hell is he thinking returning to Hogwarts? And how has he been appointed Head Boy after everything that happened?_

Draco Malfoy had been a Death Eater. There was no way Albus Dumbledore would appoint him as Head Boy. But Hermione stopped in her musings as her mind put emphasis on the past tense. She had seen the look of reluctance on his face in May to cross the courtyard to his parents. He didn't want to be on that side. Or so she assumed. Perhaps he was just scared.

Whatever the reason, she was stuck with him as her fellow Head until June. Might as well try and make it work.

When she didn't respond to his comment, Draco dropped his bag into the empty seat opposite his classmate and leaned back in the bench. "We have to share a dormitory, you know."

"I'm aware." Hermione stated as she turned a page, glancing up at him.

"Don't sound so excited, Granger. This isn't going to be a problem for you, is it?"

"I thought it would be more of a problem for _you_." She glanced up at him, giving him a pointed look.

Draco shrugged one shoulder. "Not really. I couldn't care less."

Hermione shut her book and got up, fiddling with the button fastening on her robes. "We have to go give the Prefects their duties for the duration of the trip."  
Draco narrowed his eyes at her. Something was wrong. He knew Granger could be snarky when she wanted to be, but this was not snark. It wasn't even sarcasm. She was genuinely upset about something. He had no idea what it was, but he knew that if they were going to be spending the next nine months in close quarters with each other he honestly did not want to deal with a lot of animosity. He preferred for them to get along as much as possible.

"That can wait. Sit and talk to me," he offered.

Hermione turned and gave him a surprised look. "Why?"

"Because something is bugging you."

"I'm fine."

"No, you're not."

"Look, we have responsibilities. Let's go take care of them and then we can sit in here and pretend the other person doesn’t exist."

Draco leaned forward resting his clasped hands on the table. "We're not even out of London yet, Granger. Sit. Something is bothering you and I would prefer you get it out now so the rest of the day goes by easier."

"Easier for you?" Hermione asked with narrowed eyes at him.

"Mostly." Draco answered with a nod in confirmation, "So I don't have to deal with this sullen attitude the entire way to Hogwarts."

Hermione huffed and sat back down. "Why do you care?"

"Contrary to belief amongst you Gryffindors, I'm not as much of a bastard as you think."

Hermione looked him up and down briefly. "You still seem like the same arrogant, egotistical prat I've always known."

"Ouch, Granger. That hurt a little." Draco was lying of course, and he did not try to keep the sarcasm from his voice. He took a minute to study her. She still seemed like the same stuck-up, bushy-haired know-it-all that he had grown up with, but there was something different about her. A hardness that had not been there a year ago. Even if they did get along most of the time, he could tell she wouldn't put up with any bullshit. "Why don't you give me a chance to prove you wrong, Granger? You can do that at the very least. Especially since we're going to be living together."

Hermione pondered this. She had always considered herself to be a very open-minded person. She had witnessed some changes in Draco. Even she could admit that back in May he had not appeared enthusiastic to be called over to the Death Eaters' side. She had always thought Draco incapable of acting exactly like his father. He may be as concerned with social standing, titles, and wealth as Lucius, but he was not a bad person willing to sink as low as murder to save his own life.

Hermione relaxed a little, folding her hands on the table between them. "Yes, I suppose I could. But how do I even know I can trust you not to spread rumors once we get to Hogwarts?"

"You don't. But you just said you would give me a chance."

Hermione thought about it for a minute. As much as she wanted someone completely on the outside of all of this to talk to, she could not just trust Draco like this with her deepest worries and personal problems with her boyfriend.

"I'll give you the benefit of the doubt that you're not a prat anymore."

"So, you're not going to tell me what's bothering you?"

"No, I'll figure it out on my own. It's stupid stuff anyway."

Draco quirked an eyebrow at her, but sat back in the seat. "Suit yourself." He got up from the bench and opened the door. "Might as well get this done then, like you said, so we can ignore each other the rest of the way."

# ~~S~~

The rest of the journey to Hogwarts remained uneventful. Draco and Hermione put the Prefects on their patrolling duties and then went about their own. They met back up in their small compartment a few hours later, both starving. Draco stopped the passing food cart and Hermione handed him a couple Sickles for her Cauldron Cake.

"Have you calmed down yet?" he asked, handing the snack to her.

"Yes, I suppose." Hermione sighed.

"That doesn't sound so confident." Draco eyed her as he opened his Chocolate Frog.

"Don't worry about it," she told him, picking at the wrapper of her food.

Draco hadn't planned on it. He unwrapped his candy and stuffed it into his mouth in two bites.

When they arrived at Hogwarts, Draco and Hermione told the Prefects to lead the second-year students to the carriages while they helped corral all the first years from the back of the train towards the front where Hagrid was waiting. Draco was surprisingly patient, leading a group of boys that had sat together and were talking animatedly about which House they hoped to enter. He flashed Hermione a grin when one boy stated he hoped he was placed in Slytherin.

"I wonder if Snape is teaching Potions or Defense this year?" she asked once they were seated in a carriage together, trundling up the path to the castle.

"Potions. Slughorn went back into retirement. I heard Dumbledore asked Lupin if he would consider coming back just for this year, but he turned it down." Draco looked out the window as he said this, seemingly bored, as he always was. "So, he found some young guy, just qualified as an Auror. But he jumped at the opportunity to teach. "

"Well, you said young. Being offered a teaching position at Hogwarts is not something to scoff at. And you know all this how, anyway?"

"Letters from Snape. He keeps in touch with my father and me. More so my father. But I wasn't above sneaking peeks at his mail when he wasn't in his study this summer."

Hermione just shook her head. She got out first when they arrived at the stone steps leading up to the oak front doors. They walked up together into the Entrance Hall among other students. They were both about to turn into the Great Hall when Hermione heard hers and Draco's names being called.

"Miss Granger, Mr. Malfoy, over here please." Professor McGonagall called, directing them toward her office.

Hermione gave Draco a questioning look, but he just shrugged at her and they both followed. Professor Snape was waiting inside, studying a shelf of books behind McGonagall's desk when they walked in. Severus turned at the sound of the door closing, his eyes narrowing on his students. He knew the right choice had been made when appointing the Head Girl and Boy this year. He just hoped the faith he put in Draco was not misplaced.

Yes, the boy had made mistakes and bad decisions. Narcissa had been in touch throughout most of the summer letting Severus know how the family was faring and how Draco was dealing with the fallout from May 2nd. When he recounted to the Headmaster only a few weeks ago that the choices Draco made at the end had been from his heart, and that he was honestly trying to put that part of his life behind him, he knew he had made a strong case for the boy to be considered. Also, it would give Draco an opportunity amongst the students to prove that he was, in fact, trying to change. He wanted a different life from that of his father, and he had to be given the opportunity to show it. If he couldn't start at Hogwarts, where he was surrounded by people who knew and would support him, where would he have a chance?

"Ready for your last term?" McGonagall asked as she sat at her desk.

"Yes, Professor." Hermione answered almost immediately. Draco shook his head, suppressing a smile. She could never resist answering a teacher's question.

"And you, Mr. Malfoy? How was your summer?"

"Dismal," Draco answered flatly.

"I'm sorry to hear that." McGonagall stated in a tone that indicated she was not sorry at all. "I have called you both in here, firstly, to congratulate you on your appointments of Head Girl and Boy. I know you will both do the school proud coming from such historical houses. Secondly, I wanted to give you the password to your dormitory. And lastly, Professor Snape and I wanted to discuss the upcoming year with you both."

"Discuss what exactly about this year, Professor?" Hermione asked right away.

"We want to make sure you both understand the privilege you have been given this year and the trust we are putting in you," Snape began in his usual deep, slow voice. He looked purposely at Malfoy for a moment but then addressed them both with his gaze. "We want to know, given the history between you two, your friends, and your houses in recent years, that you will be able to act with respect toward each other. That there will not be any difficulties in your living arrangements."

"I don't foresee any problems," Draco stated confidently.

"And since when did you become a Seer, Mr. Malfoy?" Snape asked in a mocking tone. Draco opened his mouth to retort but thought again and shut it.

"Miss Granger, do you anticipate any problems between Mr. Malfoy and yourself?" McGonagall asked her.

"None, Professor. I believe everything will be fine between us."

"Excellent. Your dormitory is on the third floor behind the tapestry of the four Founders. The password is "Newts," but to gain entry, you must cast a nonverbal unlocking charm."

"I believe you both were present on the days I taught nonverbal spells in your sixth year," Snape commented.

"Indeed, we were, sir." Draco responded, an edge of sarcasm to his voice.

Snape stared them down then turned to McGonagall. "I will head down to the Great Hall now, Minerva."

"Thank you, Severus. Inform the Headmaster that I will be along shortly to start the Sorting."

Snape nodded once, and with a swish of his robes he was gone from the classroom. McGonagall turned back to her students. "I will let you two head down as well, but I must first give you the passwords your Houses for the term. Please inform all the Prefects before taking your seats.” McGonagall then gave the passwords for Slytherin and Gryffindor.

Draco began to fix his robes as they walked down the corridor after leaving the Deputy Headmistress’s office, straightening and adjusting his green and silver badge. "That was an interesting conversation." he commented, turning to look at Hermione.

"Very." she agreed, straightening her own crimson and gold badge. She could hear the din of voices ahead as they approached the Great Hall. Draco walked off to the Slytherin table as they entered without another word.

Hermione turned to her own table and quickly gave the fifth, sixth, and seventh-year Prefects the password into Gryffindor tower. She then took her usual seat across from Harry and next to Ron. The latter slipped his arm around her waist and squeezed her side, leaving his hand on her hip. Hermione let him, not minding it. He wasn't trying to be sneaky. He just wanted to hold her.

"What took you so long?" he asked as the doors opened again and the first years began their traditional march up to the front. Hermione watched for a moment, a feeling of nostalgia washing over her as she took in the looks of awe and wonder on their faces.

"Professor McGonagall wanted to speak to Draco and me, give us our duties for the night. Nothing too serious."

"Do you really have to share a dormitory with him?"

"Yes. That was the other thing she wanted to discuss, along with Professor Snape. They wanted confirmation from us that we would be able to get along and that there wouldn't be any problems between us."

Ron tightened his hold around her and she stiffened at the pressure. He looked across the table over Harry's shoulder at the Slytherin table. Malfoy was staring at the front of the hall, paying his classmates no attention. "I don't like it." Ron stated.

"Well, it's not really your concern, is it Ronald?" Hermione snapped at her boyfriend. "I'm the one that has to live with him."

"But you're _my_ girlfriend."

Harry even looked confused by this when Hermione glanced at him across the table. "Ron, they're not sharing a bedroom, just a dormitory."

"There's no need for you to be so possessive." Hermione wiggled out of his hold and Ron dropped his arm. "Draco's not about to try and slip me a love potion." She turned to face the front and watch the Sorting ceremony, her back to Ron.

"Sorry, 'Mione. I know you're right." She felt his hand on her shoulder and shifted as though to shrug him off, but she did not put much effort into it. She also did not respond to him, and after a minute, Ron took his hand away.

Hermione let out a breath. Her eyes were still on the Sorting, but in her peripheral vision, she could see Ron staring down at his plate. She felt guilty for her cold shoulder, but she was not going to put up with his biased feelings toward Draco. She did not feel like having to hear Ron rant on and on every time they were together.

Ron was silent for most of the meal until Harry finally broke the ice again, bringing up Quidditch and when he thought he would hold trials for the team this year. Ron brightened up immediately, going off on how he thought his Keeper technique had improved since Fifth year and that he may stand a decent chance if he made the team again.

Hermione zoned out, staring across the hall at the Slytherin table. Her eyes found Draco and was surprised to find he was staring back at her. He raised one blonde brow at her in question and she shrugged back in response, dropping her eyes back to her plate. She moved her food around but did not eat it. She was still feeling a little bad about just before with Ron and wanted to apologize for being curt, but he had plowed right into the conversation with Harry, completely ignoring her.

_Well_ , she thought, _I can't exactly blame him since none of us were talking and Harry is just being himself, alleviating the awkwardness between us_.

Hermione sat up when dinner disappeared and was quickly replaced with dessert. She did not take anything and thought it better to just turn in now, even though Dumbledore had not dismissed them for the evening. She could not just get up and leave like that, much to her dismay. Instead, she sipped what was left of her pumpkin juice.

"I think we actually stand a fair chance against Slytherin this year." she heard Ron beside her, still going on about Quidditch.

Ron glanced up at Harry, waiting for a response and his friend tipped his head at Hermione. Ron looked sideways at her, noticing that her plate was empty and she was slowly sipping her juice.

"Are you ok, Hermione?" he asked through a mouthful of chocolate cake.

She picked her head up and smiled at him. "I'm fine, Ron. Just a bit tired. It's been a long day and I'm not particularly hungry."

Harry knew right away that was Hermione speak for ‘No, I'm not ok. I'm actually really mad at you, but I'm going to wait until we're in private to discuss this’.

"You sure?" he asked, trying to get a read on his friend. "You didn't eat much of your dinner either."

_At least Harry noticed_ , Hermione thought to herself. She smiled at him, a tight, pained smile. "Really, I'm fine."

Harry let the matter go. If Hermione needed to talk to him, she knew where to find him. He would always be there for her.

When the feast finally ended, and the golden plates had cleared, Dumbledore stated his parting words for the evening and sent them all off to bed. Hermione helped to shepherd the first years toward the doors and over to the waiting Gryffindor Prefects who would show them up to the tower. Other Gryffindors marched past, knowing their way. She took a last look around the Great Hall to make sure all the first years had left, and then turned to go up the main staircase to the third floor.

Draco watched her leave, noticing the dejected expression on her face. He had not missed the way Weasley had put his arm around her earlier in the evening, nor the way Hermione had basically pushed him off and then ignored him for almost fifteen minutes. By the time she looked ready to talk to him again, he was engaged in some conversation with Potter.

Was her relationship with Weasley what had been bothering her earlier? Not that he cared, but he had thought it weird after the battle when he saw the two together. He would have never pictured Granger with Weasley. Clearly the couple was at odds over something now. Draco didn't want to get involved. It was not his business, nor was it his problem.

Draco followed Hermione up the steps, watching as the other Gryffindors parted from her on their way to their tower. She walked alone along the corridor and then up another flight of stairs. She stopped at the top landing and stood waiting.

"Knew it was me?" Draco asked as he caught up to her.

"Who else would be following me to the Heads' dormitory?" Hermione asked, her tone almost completely serious, but still edged with a touch of cynicism.

They walked along in silence until they reached the tapestry of the four Founders. Draco pulled it aside and Hermione pointed her wand at the door. She executed a serpentine motion then whispered, "Newts." The door swung open a crack, so she pushed it open the rest of the way and entered. Draco followed behind her, and the door locked itself as soon as it was shut again.

The Heads' dormitory was about the size of the Gryffindor common room, except it was split between a common area, two bedrooms-one each on the right and left-and what Draco assumed was a bathroom in between. A fire was already lit behind the grate and crackled soothingly.

"Well, I don't see our trunks. Want to assume they've already assigned our rooms?" he asked.

Hermione shrugged in response and walked off to the bedroom on the right. She twisted the knob and it opened. "This is you," she stated after poking her head inside.

Draco unfastened his robes and loosened his tie before flopping down on the sofa. There was a coffee table in front of it, two arm chairs opposite, and a study table with room for two in the corner. Overall, it was a very nice dormitory to share, and he did not imagine he would have any trouble with that part. They did have separate bedrooms after all. He just wasn't so sure about the shared bathroom.

"It's not bad." he commented as he kicked his shoes off.

"No, I like it. Just please don't decorate with too much green," Hermione requested.

"I wasn't even planning on it. I like it as is."

Hermione let out a breath and looked around. "It is nice." She glanced around once more before shifting her gaze back to him. "Well, I think I'm going to go to bed. First day of classes tomorrow."

"I'm positively riveted." Draco deadpanned. "Hey, Granger," he called as Hermione turned towards her bedroom. She stopped and looked at him. "Everything ok?"

She gave him one of the fake smiles he had seen her use on Potter during the feast. "Fine."

_Liar_ , Draco thought to himself. He watched Hermione disappear behind her door. If she didn't want to tell him, he wouldn't force it. He already knew she didn't trust him, and frankly he hadn't given her a real reason to, except to ask for her to give him a chance. Which, apparently, she wasn't willing to do. It didn't bother him, and if her attitude ever turned sour and she tried to take something out on him, he could stay in Slytherin House.

Whatever Hermione's problem was, it was not his to worry about.


	2. Chapter 2

Hermione rose early the following morning, mixed feelings of anxiety and excitement leaving her nauseas. She eagerly anticipated starting classes, but she knew the work load this year was going to make her fifth year seem tame. She laid out her uniform and robes and grabbed her things for the bathroom, then stopped just outside the door when she heard the shower turn on inside.

 _What was Draco doing up this early?_ She hadn't expected that. And she couldn't exactly be angry with him when they hadn't discussed a morning bathroom rotation yet. She decided to put her shower off until that evening and added 'Discuss Bathroom Schedule with Draco' to her mental to-do list. She would just have a couple extra cups of coffee with her breakfast this morning to help her wake up.

Hermione got dressed slowly, her brain distracted with thoughts of yesterday on the train and last night at the feast. She kept going over Ron's comments, his actions, and the expressions on his face. Nothing seemed amiss about him, but she felt as though his attitude had shifted over the summer. He was not as patient as he had been a year ago. The again, he had never had a high level of patience to begin with for much of anything. He was in a rush to make up for an entire year of lost time. Hermione didn't understand why when they had the rest of their lives ahead of them to spend time together.

She was fighting with her hair, trying to brush it into submission when she heard the shower turn off and the door on the far side of the bathroom open and close. She took a last glance in her mirror and pulled out her wand casting a glamour charm over the thin scar on her neck like she did every morning. It was a remnant from the slice left by Bellatrix's knife. She knew she could magically remove it, but there was always the chance she could make it worse. It wasn't like the scar on her forearm that would never heal completely and could never be removed. She was branded there for life.

Draco left his bedroom at the same time she left hers, adjusting his tie and the placement of his Head Boy badge on his robes.

"Morning, Granger. Sleep well?"

"Well enough, I suppose." Hermione answered, hoisting her bag onto her shoulder.

"Why do you have all of your books? I doubt you're taking every subject today."

"I want to be prepared for whatever I do have today." Hermione stated defensively. "I like to be ready for anything."

Draco shook his head at her and picked up his own, lighter, bag. He had merely packed his notebooks, quills, ink, and a few extra rolls of parchment. If need be he would run back up here to grab his books before going to class. But it was only the first day and he wasn't too worried about needing them.

Granger was silent as they walked down to the Great Hall together. Her eyes remained forward, not even glancing sideways at him once. They walked in together but parted at their separate tables. Draco watched her take a seat between Weasley and his sister. Hermione immediately launched into a conversation with the younger redhead, helping herself to toast and coffee.

Draco started to sit down, looking up as he did so, noticing for the first time the looks he was receiving from some of his housemates. They weren't curious stares, but downright glares. He set his bag down and reached for the pitcher of pumpkin juice, ignoring them.

As he was getting started on his eggs Snape began walking up and down the length of the table handing out schedules. Draco took his silently and glanced it over. Double Potions and Arithmancy first thing this morning. He would definitely need his books. Looking up again he saw that several Slytherins were still glaring at him. Something about the malicious gleam in some of their eyes caught him off guard, but he didn't let it show on his face. It made him wonder, though, if his housemates had been looking at him like that last night. If they had been he never noticed.

Draco quickly bolted down the rest of his breakfast then dashed back to the third floor to grab his textbooks before going down to the dungeons. He didn't give the stares from his housemates another thought until lunch time when he entered the Great Hall again, and the same Slytherins glowered at him as he sat down, pulling a plate towards him.

They looked away as he began to eat, and he glanced around at them surreptitiously as he feigned reading over the rest of his schedule. He made note that all those who had been regarding him just now and at breakfast had parents who were Death Eaters, and many of them had been sentenced to Azkaban following the battle on May 2nd. He and his parents had defected only hours before the end, thus sparing them all similar sentencing.

He assumed that was the reason for the hated looks he was receiving now. His mother's lie about Potter had in part allowed for the Dark Lord's downfall, thus condemning those on the losing side to life terms among the Dementors. They most likely blamed him, as he was there and easily accessible to lay the guilt on. But Draco wasn't going to let it bother him. He had spent nearly the entirety of his sixth year in solitude. He didn't need the comradery of his housemates, though it did dispirit him to think that he may not be welcome in his own House common room.

He wasn't going to try and change minds that were already made up about him. His sole focus this year was to complete his studies and take his N.E.W.T.s. He had plans of continuing his studies after Hogwarts, if only for a little time to avoid being home right away. He knew his mother would begin pushing him to marry as soon as he finished school, and he didn't doubt that his father was already looking in to possible matches for him among the Sacred Twenty-Eight families. Bulstrode, Parkinson, and Greengrass immediately came to mind as he knew these families to be firmly rooted in Slytherin House for generations.

As it was, Draco had no interest in marrying young. Nor did he have any interest in a bride from among those families. Two of them he knew were staunchly blood-purists. The Greengrass girls thought along different lines. Well, Astoria did at least. He couldn't speak for her older sister Daphne. He hadn't seen her last night, nor on the train and assumed that she had not returned to finish her last year. Astoria, however, was sitting about halfway down the table. She had her eyes glued to her Herbology textbook, reminding him a bit of Granger.

Astoria he knew, from brief conversations, was more open-minded than most Slytherins about blood-purity. He appreciated that in her, but aside from that there was not much about her that interested him. She was two years younger than him and they had hardly spent any time together in the past nor seen each other in between classes except at meals. Sure, he had grown up with some of the Slytherins in his year, even been childhood friends with them. But over the years they had drifted apart. He still maintained friendly relationships with Nott and Zabini, but he had mostly grown apart from the others. Especially the girls. They held no real substance in his eyes. There had been a time when Draco thought he knew what he was looking for in a mate. But the last couple of years had changed his opinion about more than just what his blood-status meant to the world.

# ~~S~~

After breakfast Hermione had not been surprised to see Draco rushing back to the third floor. What she didn't understand was how he was already down at the dungeons when she arrived there ten minutes later. He hardly looked out of breath and was leaning against the wall, his nose buried in his Potions textbook.  
When Snape arrived a few minutes later, she, Harry, and Ron grabbed a table together as they usually did and took out their cauldrons in preparation. The minute the class was assembled he flicked his wand at the chalkboard and instructions appeared. Snape didn't even bother to give an introduction, nor greet them. They were expected to be quiet and begin brewing without question. Today they would start the Hiccoughing Solution.

Hermione pulled out her small chest of ingredients taking out what she needed before heading over to the student stores for what she was missing. Harry followed her, giving the sleeve of her robes a little tug.

"I didn't get to ask you at breakfast, but I wanted to make sure you were all right. You seemed…off last night."

Hermione began gathering ingredients from the shelves. "I'm fine, Harry. I am still a little upset with Ron, but I'm going to talk to him at lunch today. I'm hoping we can figure something out about spending time together. I know it's important to him. I want him to realize it's important to me, too."

Harry nodded, quickly gathering ingredients as Snape had just glanced in their direction and was giving them both a scowl. He and Hermione quickly retreated to their table and got started on the potion. At the end of the lesson Snape walked around to observe how everyone had done with the first phase.

"You will leave your potions to stew for the next forty-eight hours until we meet again and will continue thus." He announced, coming to stand at the front of the class once more. "I want an essay on the ingredients for this potion and the importance of letting it mature before moving on to the second phase to be handed in on Wednesday. Minimum twenty-four inches. You are dismissed."

"Merlin, I'm starved." Ron moaned as they left class. "Hope there's something good for lunch."

Hermione watched Harry roll his eyes and grinned to herself. _Always the first thought._ She waved goodbye to the boys and headed for Arithmancy while they headed back to Gryffindor Tower.  
When lunch break came she met up with them in the Great Hall. Hermione waited until Ron had taken the first few bites of his chicken and ham pie before attempting to broach the topic. "I wanted to talk about last night."

"You mean your little fit before you stopped talking to me?" Ron asked as he shoveled another forkful into his mouth and began chewing.

Hermione bristled. She didn't have a fit. Ron's comments and attitude had been unnecessary, and she didn't want to encourage it. He had been biased against all Slytherins since she had met him. He hadn't even wanted to go back and save Malfoy, Crabbe, and Goyle in the Room of Requirement. She knew in Ron's eyes they had done nothing to deserve their sympathy or aid.

"I don't understand what your problem was last night, Hermione. I was trying to express my concern about your safety sharing a dorm with Malfoy. He's not exactly trustworthy. Sorry I said anything."

Hermione opened her mouth to make a retort, but she shut it again. "That's not the point, Ronald. Look, let's just forget last night. I want to talk to you about us."  
Ron looked sideways at her in interest as he ate another forkful of pie. "Is something wrong?"

Hermione shook her head. "Not at all. I just know that you want to be able to spend time together. And since this our N.E.W.T. year, time is going to be very precious. I was thinking we could go over our schedules and see when we both have free time during the week."

"You don't have free time, Hermione, and you know it." Ron stated matter-of-factly. "Between classes, studying, homework, Head Girl duties…" He ticked each one off on a finger. "Anything I'm missing?"

Hermione frowned at him, noticing that even Harry looked surprised by the comment. "Ron," She said his name softly, trying to get his attention back. "I'd be willing to make some time for you. I can do that. You're my boyfriend and I want to be able to spend time with you."

"Drop a few classes and you'll have more time."

"I can't do that."

"I knew it. Thought I'd ask at least." Ron set his fork down and served himself another piece of pie.

Hermione was silent. This conversation was not going the way she had planned. She thought her idea of comparing schedules would work. But apparently Ron wasn't going for it. He just wanted to remain bent out of shape because of her "fit" from the previous evening.

"I'm going to the library." Hermione said quietly as she stood and gathered her bag.

"But you didn't eat anything." Harry pointed out.

Hermione turned back to him, glanced down at her plate and then back to friend. "Oh. I'm not that hungry right now. See you both at dinner." She bent over and kissed the top of Ron's head as she left, not bothering to look over her shoulder as she exited the Great Hall.

Ten minutes later she was situated at her favorite table in the library, her potions book and a fresh roll of parchment out. She made a quick mental list of the ingredients for the Hiccoughing Solution and went off to the Potions section to begin her search. By the time lunch was over she had managed to list the attributes of each ingredient and from there could write up the importance of them and why they were used for this potion.

Satisfied, Hermione packed away her things and left for Ancient Runes. As she turned the corner into the hallway for the classroom, she noticed Draco standing outside the door looking bored.

"Hey, Granger." He greeted her with an easy smile and reached into his bag for one the green apples he had taken from the Slytherin table before leaving the Hall. He handed it to her as Hermione stopped on the other side of the door. "Thought you might be hungry since you didn't eat any lunch."

"Why were you watching me?"

Draco shrugged, "Nothing else to do while I'm eating." She took the apple hesitantly from him but muttered a quiet ‘thank you’ and bit into it. "Been hiding in the library?" He asked and wasn't surprised when she didn't answer him. He assumed whatever it was that it once more had something to do with Weasley. He couldn't help but notice the two at lunch, seeing as the Gryffindor table was next to the Sytherin's. There wasn't much else to entertain him since no one at his own table would speak a word to him.

It had appeared as though Granger was sincerely trying to get Weasley to talk to her, and whatever it was her boyfriend had no interest in it. The redhead was a fool. He had the brightest witch in their class at his side and he acted as though she were there merely for his enjoyment when he fancied it. Just because he was a war hero didn't mean he suddenly took the loyalty of those around him for granted.

Draco could tell Granger was getting to the point where she would want to call it quits, but it wasn't in her nature to give up. She would fight. And she would lose.  
"So besides all of our core classes and Ancient Runes, what other classes do we share?" Hermione asked suddenly.

"You've never noticed?" Draco was stunned. They had only been sharing the same classes since their third year. Then again, the witch did have a singular focus that he was quite envious of. But still. "Well, there's Arithmancy and Care of Magical Creatures. You quit Divination in third year and I decided to drop the subject in sixth year."

"I can't believe you took that rubbish class for so long."

"Same way I can't believe you took Muggle Studies."

Hermione narrowed her eyes at him, ready to make another retort but Professor Babbling turned the corner at that moment with the rest of their Advanced Ancient Runes class behind her. Draco quirked both of his eyebrows at her and strolled into the classroom. Hermione huffed out loud and followed him in.

After discovering that they shared the same elective classes, Hermione began to pay a little more attention to Malfoy as the week progressed. He was clearly intelligent and paid rapt attention even as he took extensive notes. But he never raised his hand. Not even to ask a question. Hermione had toned that habit down back in her fifth year. Now she only ever answered questions if they were put to her directly by a professor.

She still sat with Harry and Ron in all the classes they shared. Both had dropped Care of Magical Creatures, so she was among the few Gryffindors left that still took the class at N.E.W.T. level. She had been surprised when Draco admitted to still taking it. She would have thought after fifth year that he would consider the class unnecessary.

"It's an easy class." Draco admitted as they walked back to the castle from the grounds on Friday evening. "And besides, it's also a break from the castle. Get outside every once and a while."

"Like you can't get fresh air on the weekends. We're in the Scottish Highlands, Draco."

"Yes, but I mean during the week. It breaks up the monotony of being inside all the time."

"And the fact that Hagrid is still teaching has nothing to do with it?" Hermione's foot got caught on a root and she stumbled a little as she asked the question. Draco reached out and grabbed her elbow to help steady her, but she was off balance form the weight of her bag.

"Easy there, Granger. Again, why do you have all your books with you? You only have four of these subjects today."

Hermione shrugged. "Habit."

"I can only imagine how much your shoulders and back must hurt."

"Not so bad really, it's my ankle right now that's throbbing."

"Give me your bag, I'll carry it the rest of the way." Draco held his hand out for it. Hermione watched him as she handed her bag over. He slipped it over his shoulder and then offered his hand again to help her step over another root that was protruding from the ground.

"Thank you," They walked along in silence for a minute or two before Hermione turned to him again. "You didn't answer my question."

"I don't mind that Hagrid teaches the class. In fact, I don't care anymore. Today was rather interesting, though. First time I've ever seen a Runespoor. He seemed to handle it well."

"Well, the creature itself is not very vicious. It just takes some skill to handle. It's too bad Harry can't speak Parseltongue anymore. If he was still taking the class it would have been very entertaining to watch with a three-headed snake."

Hermione was still limping lightly on her right foot as they walked up the stone steps to the foot bridge. Draco continued to carry her bag all the way back to the castle and offered to take her up to the hospital wing before dinner.

"I think it's fine now, just needed to walk it off."

"You sure? You were limping on it the way whole up here."

Hermione tested putting her full weight on her foot again and winced. Draco shook his head at her. _Stop being so stubborn, Granger._ "Yes, all right. Hospital wing."  
Draco took her elbow again to help get her up the first few steps, but they stopped when Hermione's name was called below them. Draco turned to see Ronald Weasley rushing up the steps toward them. He had his _Cleansweep Eleven_ in one hand, clearly having just come in from practicing for Quidditch trials.

"Hermione, what happened? Why are you limping?"

"Oh, I caught my foot on a root outside."

"Why does Malfoy have your bag?" Ron asked, throwing a sneer in the Slytherin's direction.

"I was carrying it for her, so she wouldn't have to. It's called being polite, Weasley."

"Well, I'm her boyfriend. I'll take it." Ron reached for Hermione's bag on Draco's shoulder and the blonde handed it to him.

"She should go to the hospital wing. Madame Pomfrey can heal her ankle."

"I can take care of my girlfriend, Malfoy." Ron snapped at him. He took Hermione's hand and began to help her up the stairs.

Draco returned to their dormitory to drop off his bag and sit for a few minutes before going back down to dinner. After the week he had had sitting at the Slytherin table in solitude he wasn't in much of a rush to end his Friday on such a lonesome note. He and Hermione had their first patrolling duties tonight from ten to eleven, and he didn't feel like dwelling on his ostracism while wandering dark, deserted corridors.

At dinner his attention was once more drawn to Granger and her boyfriend. He was surprised to see how attentive Weasley was to her now. They were engaged in a conversation and he was looking at her and listening to everything that she said. They shared easy smiles and Granger even leaned over at one point to kiss his cheek. Whatever had happened between the time he left them on the stairs and now had moved them past the awkwardness Draco had seen at the beginning of the week.

"Mind if I sit with you?"

Draco looked up from his plate at Astoria Greengrass. She was offering him a shy smile.

"No," He muttered and moved over a little on the bench to make room for her.

"You don't have to sit alone all the time, Draco." She told him as she began taking food.

"Not really much of an option when the rest of table won't sit anywhere near me."

"I'm here now, aren't I? And not all of the Slytherins hate you."

"No just the ones from fifth year and up." Draco retorted dryly.

"Well, they can't do anything to you, can they? One, you're Head Boy and that alone means they must treat you with proper respect. And two, you know Snape would never allow students from his house to attack each other."

Draco turned to the brunette witch. "Who said anything about other students attacking me?"

"I'm just thinking out loud. Don't tell me the thought hasn't crossed your mind? If I were you I would be expecting it at some point. A random hex or jinx in the corridor when a teacher isn't looking is not that hard to pull off."

Draco gave the younger girl a smirk. "Speaking from experience are we, Greengrass?"

She blushed and went back to eating for a minute. "I wanted to ask," She began again after finishing the last bite of her pork chop, "if you could possibly help me with Potions?"

Draco considered her request for a minute. Tutoring was part of his Head Boy duties, and one he had been hoping to find some way out of doing it. But tutoring Astoria wouldn't be so bad. She was good company and could hold an intelligent conversation for more than five minutes. And it was also a subject that he was comfortable with.

"Sure, Astoria. When would you like to start?"

"This weekend if possible. Professor Snape gave us a ridiculous essay to finish by Monday on the Shrinking Solution and the negative side effects if not brewed properly."

Draco smirked to himself. He remembered when Snape had threatened Longbottom's toad with Shrinking Solution because the poor kid could never brew properly. It wasn't an overall difficult potion to brew, but you had to pay attention when adding certain ingredients. A single drop too many of leech juice and you could accidently poison the drinker.

Draco spent the next morning with Astoria in the library. They walked there together after breakfast, chatting about their first week of classes. Astoria asked him how it was being Head Boy and admitted she had been made a prefect in her fifth year and again this year as well. Draco knew this already. He and Granger had been given a list of the all the prefects by House and their schedule of Head Duties on the second day.

Granger would have to tutor as well and her time for it in the library was the same as his. Weekday evenings when available, and Saturdays. So, it didn't surprise him that she was already situated at a table when he and Astoria arrived. She was alone for the time being, not many other students as inclined to study first thing on a Saturday morning.

Astoria waved to her when they walked in and Granger waved back, giving Draco a confused look. He sat down with his back to her and pulled out his quill and parchment. Astoria began to go over the potion and the ingredients, explaining it to him in her way as to why she had a certain opinion about something. He listened and pointed things out to her that she was missing then she went off to the Potions section to grab a few books.

Draco pulled out his own homework, deciding on Arithmancy so he didn't get his own Potions work confused with Astoria's. He could hear the scratching of Granger's quill at the table behind him, smirking at the quick speed of her writing. He wanted to turn around and tease her a little, well-meaningly of course, but as he thought about what to say he realized it was pointless. Granger would either ignore him or get pissed off and that would mean he would have to deal with her attitude later. Neither option appealed to him because he wouldn't get the rise out of her that he wanted. Thus, it was pointless.

As the morning hours wore on, students here and there came in. He watched a few first years go over to Hermione and sit with her for some time as they went over Transfiguration homework. She was patient with them, explaining in terms that would make sense why a spell had to be cast a certain way for it to work correctly. He was half listening to one of these conversations when a second year Slytherin walked over hesitantly.

"Could you help me find a Charms book?"

Draco almost quirked an eyebrow at the kid but suppressed it. He half considered making up some excuse, but then as the thought crossed his mind he swore he could feel Granger's eyes boring into his back.

"Sure, Matthews." Draco got up and followed his fellow Slytherin over to the proper section. He needed a book on the Disarming Charm, which was located on one of the higher shelves. Draco pulled out his wand and summoned the book wordlessly down then handed it over. "Is this the one?"

"Yes, thank you. Do you know this spell?"

Draco paused. He knew it well. The spell having saved his life many times over the night of May 2nd. He had used it to disarm Dumbledore on the night the old man was supposed to die. He still didn't know how the wizard had managed to escape. One moment he was standing on the edge of the Astronomy Tower, and the next he was gone.

The Dark Lord had not been happy, and Draco and the other Death Eaters present had been punished for the failure. He rubbed the inside of his left arm without thinking, looking down when he realized the second year was saying his name.

"I do know the spell." Draco admitted. "If you need to practice let me know and I'll help you."

"Thanks, Draco."

The second year wandered out of the section ahead of him and Draco followed him back to the tables. Granger was watching him as he took his seat again and flashed him a small smile. He ignored her and took his seat across from Astoria.

"Was that really as bad as your expression is making it seem right now?"

"No, I was just thinking." Draco muttered. He rubbed his arm again in his lap and fixed the long sleeve of his shirt before resting his arms on the table. "So, where were we?" He asked, changing the topic.

After their study session in the library together, Astoria began to sit with him more often at meals. A few times throughout the week, so he wouldn't be alone, she had explained when he asked about her new-found interest in his company. He suspected she may have been developing a crush on him, and if that were so he would have to nip it in the bud before it went too far. He didn't want to lead the poor girl on and wind up hurting her.

As it turned out Draco didn't have to do much to dissuade any feelings in Astoria Greengrass for him. Come the third week of September she was happily enjoying the company of her fellow Slytherin sixth year Prefect Connor Griffiths. She still sat with Draco from time to time, but the frequency lessened as the month waned on. And Draco found he was ok with this. Astoria had her own life and friends, and she should be with them, not feel obligated to sit with him because the rest of Slytherin House had shunned him.

The stares, however, had not lessened. His housemates had progressed to whispering when he was at the table, and whenever he passed other Slytherins in the corridors. Draco just ignored all of this as though it weren't happening. It was easiest to act as though he was repeating his sixth year all over again and be satisfied with solitude.

Only he wasn't. September rolled into October and he felt lonelier than he ever had before. Granger was decent enough company when they were in the Head common room together working or just relaxing. But she never had much to say to him, preferring to bury herself behind piles of books and parchment. The silence didn't bother him because she was simply there. It was the presence of another human being in the room with him that made him feel better.

Although sometimes he did wish Hermione would try and talk while she was working. If there was one fellow student he didn't mind listening to it was her, because most of what she said made sense. Even if she did tend to go off on a tangent from time to time. Her mind was so busy that one thought just steamrolled right into the next, her brain processing information nearly as fast as she could talk when she got going.

But those moments were few and far between. There was one evening she had lapsed into perfect French after they returned from patrolling. Hermione had gone off about the late hour and amount of work she still needed to complete, her English suddenly switching over, making him laugh loudly. It was his reaction that had made her stop and look up and realize what had happened. Hermione had broken out in laughter as well. It was obvious then that the witch was stressed, and he wondered if she engaged in any relief activities with Weasley. She could have certainly used a round or two of snogging that night just to calm down.

They had shared a moment that evening. A sense of comradery. However, Hermione had slipped right back into her usual aloof nature the following day. It seemed she only let her real emotions show when she was under pressure. The rest of the time she wore a mask, just as he did. It was very Slytherin of her and he had to wonder why. Maybe life within the Golden Trio was not as charmed as everyone believed.

# ~~S~~

Hermione was shocked when she watched Draco get up to help his fellow Slytherin. She would have thought the Head Boy would make excuses not to. But perhaps the pretty Slytherin brunette that he was assisting had something to do with it. Showing off that he could be accommodating to others than just himself. It would be typical Draco to try and fool someone into believing he was more than what he appeared to be.

Her own morning in the library that first Saturday of the term was not as productive as she would have liked. Many students continued to come over to her as the hours slipped by and she could barely concentrate on her own work. She was more than happy to stop when need be and assist her fellow students. Mostly First, Second, and Third Years, but it meant sacrificing time with her own studies and late nights in the common room.

September whipped by in a blur for Hermione. Harry held trials for the Gryffindor team the following Sunday and she went out to the pitch to support Ron, although she did have her Advanced Arithmancy textbook and spent most of the time reading. She only put it down when Ron was up and picked it back up again once his turn had passed.

He gave her a little bit of an attitude about it at lunch, but she ignored it and simply changed the topic to how she thought he had done that morning. Ron was more than happy at that point to forget his annoyance with her reading habits and took over the conversation asking Hermione if she had seen the dive he had done at the end of his tryout to block the lowest hoop.

While Ron rambled on, his attention momentarily on Harry and Ginny across the table, Hermione looked up and noticed that Draco was once more sitting alone at the end of the Slytherin table. He had a textbook opened in front of him, and a plate of food that he had hardly touched. He had segregated himself ever since the beginning of the term and she wondered why. He never mentioned anything about his own housemates. Then again, they didn't really talk much for two people sharing a private dormitory.

He appeared lonely, not so much bored, with his head resting in his hand and a tired expression on his face. Hermione supposed she could be a better roommate and try to get involved a little more with Draco. Not that living together so far had been difficult, but if he was going through a tough time with…well, anything, she wanted him to know that she was there if he needed to talk.

"Hermione? Are you listening?" Ron asked beside her.

Hermione tore her gaze from Malfoy and looked back to Ron with a smile on her face. "Yes, I'm listening. I think the team Harry put together is going to do very well this year."

Ron flashed her a brilliant smile, then launched right back into the conversation with his sister.

Hermione glanced up again at the Slytherin table, surprised to see that Draco was staring back at her. He held her gaze for another moment, then grabbed his textbook and left abandoning his half-finished meal.

From the look in his eyes she could tell something was not right. Hermione decided that if he was awake when she got back to the dormitory she was going to ask him what was going on. Because truth be told, she was starting to fee concerned. And while that was not an oddity for her, the person she was concerned about was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know Hermione, and probably Draco as well, dropped Care of Magical Creatures after Fifth year, but Hermione in this fic will be pursuing a job in the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures. Thus, the class has some importance. I do not believe it is stated in HBP that Draco dropped the class, (if it is let me know – literally just read the book and cannot remember), but I think he would have stayed if he knew he could get passing grades easily.


	3. Chapter 3

When Hermione did finally return to the shared common room that evening after dinner, it was very late and she was exhausted. She assumed Draco was already in bed since there was no sight of him. Ron had asked her to come back to Gryffindor tower for a few hours so they could have "alone time" as he put it. They spent the majority of it snogging on his bed hidden by the curtains of his four-poster. She had thought ahead and cast a silencing charm over the bed so any of the boys that may have come in wouldn't hear the creaking as she and Ron rolled around switching positions.

She didn't mind his kissing, it was very nice. Not that she had much to compare it to. Her first snog had been Viktor Krum, and while they had explored a little more than snogging together, going further than a few impassioned kisses with Ron made her feel anxious. She didn't fully understand why when she had known Ron longer than she had known Viktor. He had practically been a stranger to her when they danced at the Yule Ball together, even though over the course of her fourth year she had gotten to know him more. She should have been frightened silly to engage in some of the intimate moments they shared together. But she had been more comfortable, confident even, around Viktor than she felt around Ron now.

It had nothing to do with her physical appearance. Or at least she thought it didn't. The only reason she placed a glamour charm over the scar on her neck was because she knew Ron didn't like looking at it. It wasn't the same as the scar on her arm. She had taken to wearing long sleeves and refused to let Ron try and disrobe her. Again, she knew she could just heal the wound on her throat, but she was proud of her scars. They reminded her that she was still alive. That everything that had happened was real and it shouldn't simply be forgotten about.

Ron didn't hate her scars, he just preferred not to see them. He didn't want to be reminded of that ugly time in their lives when everything was uncertain, and they could have all died. But Hermione saw them in an opposite light. They made her thankful that she was still breathing, thankful that her friends were still with her. It wasn't just a bad dream that they all woke up from after nine months. It had been the harshest reality that three, barely of age wizards had to face. And it made her reconsider her choices in life. Because she only had one, and she wasn't going to settle for less than what made her happy.

# ~S~

September moved swiftly into October, bringing with it the beginnings of winter cold in the Scottish Highlands. Hermione started placing warming charms on her stockings, so her legs wouldn't freeze in the drafty corridors and classrooms. But there were days when the cold grew so biting that she had no other choice than to wear her black pants with the stockings on underneath.

She did her best to find as much time with Ron as she could manage between homework and Head Girl duties. Ron had his own work load to tackle as the weeks went on, plus Quidditch practice now. The first game was in a few weeks, right before Halloween. He had been smart in giving up Prefect duties this year. Hermione had considered turning down the position of Head Girl after receiving the letter, when the initial afterglow faded, because she wanted to be able to have enough time for studying and for Ron. But she had handled worse in her third year, and she knew she could handle this.

She already planned on going to support Ron at the first game, even if she didn't really understand Quidditch. She had been watching it for years and she knew how it worked, but she didn't quite grasp the concept of why some people were so passionate about it. It was a very dangerous sport, and she supposed that excitement was part of it, she just didn't share it. It was just another thing on Ron's list that annoyed him about her from time to time.

She didn't share his enthusiasm. It was a list that was starting to grow very long by the middle of October.

"Come on, Hermione, we've been at it for hours. Let's go to bed." Ron whined across the table at her. They were sitting in the Gryffindor common room finishing up homework that was due Monday. Hermione was done with all of hers and checking it over. Ron had barely finished one essay, opting instead to create a miniature Quaffle and Quidditch hoop out of scrap parchment and make the ball zoom around as he blocked it with his fingers.

"If you're tired go on up. I should finish this. I have so much due on Monday and Tuesday plus two books to read."

Ron let his bits of parchment fall to the table, then leaned in so no one else around them would hear. "So, come upstairs with me. I know something we can do that will relieve the stress you're feeling." He waggled his eyebrows at her in attempt to be funny, but Hermione looked at him as though he had just asked her to burn all her books.

"Not now, Ron." She hissed at him, casting a wary eye around to see if anyone had heard him.

Ron slumped back down in his chair with a grumpy expression. "When then, Hermione? You always say, 'not now', 'I'm not ready', 'not yet'. Bloody hell, it's been almost six months."

"Why are you in such a rush?" She whispered.

Why don't you want to do anything?" Ron countered, his voice slightly higher than hers.

Hermione flicked her wand where it lay in her lap, casting a nonverbal silencing charm around them. She didn't need the entire common room to hear them discussing their sex life. Or rather, the lack of.

"It's not that I don't, Ron."

"Then what is it?" Ron watched her for a moment as Hermione struggled with her words. Either she didn't know what to say, or she didn't want to say the wrong thing. He would take either over her silence. But that was what she chose.

"Fine." Ron stated as he slammed his books shut and piled them. He started to turn to go but stopped and looked back at her. "Just…fine." He left the table and disappeared upstairs.

Hermione chanced a glance around the common room. Only Harry and Ginny were looking in her direction. No doubt they had noticed Ron get up in a huff and storm off. She flicked her wand discreetly, lifting the charm, and went back to work.

The following morning, she walked down to breakfast alone from the third floor. Draco had been in the shower when she got up. Having taken care of the act herself the previous evening upon returning she wasn't in need and could simply get dressed and go downstairs. Sometimes she waited for Draco, most of the time she didn't. Today was one of those times. She wasn't in the mood for company. Nor was she in the mood for his too-observant nature that she was becoming annoyingly familiar with.

She didn't want her fellow Head asking questions about why she looked so upset and why she was so quiet. Normally if she waited for him, it was because she wanted to discuss classwork and get his opinion on something that Professor Vector, Professor Babbling, or even Professor Snape had gone over. Yes, of course she could ask him these questions when they were in the library _together_. However, they were never together in the library, and the bulk of their time was usually filled with tutoring. When they were in the common room together studying, Draco typically sat in one of the chairs by the fire and she occupied the table. Together in the room, but on opposite sides.

Hermione entered the Great Hall seeing to her relief that Ron had not come down yet. She grabbed a seat near the middle of the table and poured herself a bowl of cereal. She was about to take the first bite when she looked up and saw Ron, Harry, and Ginny walk in. Ron glanced at her and started to walk down the table to her but stopped halfway there and sat down.

Harry and Ginny both glanced between Ron and Hermione. Ron was purposely not looking at his girlfriend as he began to fill his plate. Hermione was slowly stirring her cereal, her eyes on a book beside her bowl. Ginny took a seat across from her brother and poured herself some cereal before opening a conversation. Harry left her to it and walked down the table taking a seat across from Hermione. "Is everything all right between you and Ron? This is the first time I have seen you two not sit together at a meal since term started."

Hermione shut her book and pushed her half-finished bowl aside. She didn't look at him as she poured herself a cup of coffee and added milk and a little sugar to it. "I could tell you one thing, and Ron is going to tell you something completely different." She stated as she stirred her coffee.

"That's usually how it is with you two. Does this have anything to do with last night?"

She sipped her coffee before responding. "Ron asked me again last night to sleep with him."

"Again?"

"He's been asking since the summer. Don't you guys talk about this stuff?"

"No. I'm dating his younger sister. I doubt he wants to hear about that. And frankly, hearing about your sex life with Ron doesn't appeal to me. Is he pressuring you?" Harry asked, looking concerned.

"Not so much in the definition you're thinking of."

"He's nagging you?"

"That would be a more accurate term, yes."

Needing to do something with his hands, Harry grabbed a goblet and filled it pumpkin juice taking a large sip. "What have you told him?"

"That I'm not ready. I don't understand why he wants to rush our relationship. It's already taken him seven years to admit how he feels."

"Because he wasted those seven years and now he's realizing that he could have been with you all this time, but he was too much of a prat about it." Harry explained in a very matter-of-fact tone. He obviously had observed more than Hermione anticipated.

"And now he wants to make up for lost time."

Harry sighed. "I get where you're coming from 'Mione, I do. Ginny and I haven't slept together yet because we don't think the timing is right, and we don't want to rush things either. We barely started out as a couple before I had to tell her that it wouldn't work. And then we spent almost an entire year without seeing each other."

"But you want to? Don't you? I mean…Never mind. It's none of my business." Hermione took a large sip of coffee to hide the blush that crept into her cheeks. It was awkward asking such a personal question of her best friend.

Harry smiled softly and waved his hand, dismissing her curiosity. "No, it's ok. Yes, of course I want to have sex with Ginny. It's just a matter of both of us being ready. I know she's not a virgin, she knows that I am. But that doesn't matter to either of us." Harry paused to let that little bit of information sink in. "It's more about being with each other right now. Rebuilding what we had before this last year happened."

Hermione let her head fall into her hand. "I wish Ron felt that way."

"I'm sure he does, Hermione. He just…" Harry trailed off. He didn't want to make excuses for his friend or assume to know what Ron was thinking concerning his relationship with Hermione when they never discussed it. He settled on an opinion of his own. "Honestly, I think he was spoiled too much by his mother this summer." Hermione looked up, confused. "What do you mean?"

Harry thought for a moment as he poured himself another cup of pumpkin juice. "Ron is the youngest of six boys. And then a year after he was born Ginny came along. She was the first girl born to the family in generations and the last born for their parents. She was the golden child and never wanted for her mother's attention. Ron did. But he got used to being in the shadows coming from a big family." Harry gestured between them. "You and I grew up differently. We were both only children, but you had your parents' support. I was alone, no family except for my aunt and uncle and Dudley. But they acted for the most part like I was invisible. And after I got used to it I found that it suited me. I didn't crave their attention the way Ron did his mother's growing up.

"But now Molly is starting to get an empty nest. Bill is married, Charlie has been living in Romania for years. Percy, Fred, and George have all moved out. Ginny is not exactly craving her mother's attention right now, having grown up with it. So, Molly focused her attention on Ron this summer. And I don't know if you noticed, but he lapped it up."

Hermione shook her head. "No, I didn't notice. I spent a lot of time alone. I probably should have been a little more attentive to him."

Harry reached across the table to lay his hand overs hers. "You took the time you needed to come to grips with everything that happened. Ron can't fault you for that. You suffered so much more than either of us did. Ginny is still trying to cope with things, too. She still has nightmares about Bellatrix."

"I'm so sorry, Harry."

"There's only so much that I can do for her. I wish there was more, but her mind needs to ease back into what reality is now. Which is why we're taking things slow." "Maybe you should have this talk with Ron."

"I already have. On the train, before term started. I don't think Ron heard any of it. I don't mean to put him down in any way. You're both my best friends. I'm loyal to each of you, and I want this to work out for you and Ron. We've all had to grow up fast in the last few years and…people change in those situations. I'm not saying Ron is a bad person now. But his experience was both the same and different from ours."

Hermione was silent for a minute as she considered what Harry said. Ron never went into much detail about where he had been or what he had done when he left them that night just before Christmas last year. She wondered how close to home he had gotten, if he had considered going home. She knew it must have been a temptation for him. To be with parents again and know that they were safe.

"Maybe he heard some of it." Hermione stated, looking back up a Harry, "because for the past few weeks he's been very patient. But last night when he brought it up he tried to make it seem like something so casual. That we should do it just to do it."

"Well, when Ron was with Lavender I have no idea how far they went. He barely ever spoke about it except to say that it was purely chemical. In the beginning, he seemed to really enjoy himself and they would disappear for hours at a time, so Merlin only knows what they really got up to. It wouldn't surprise me if they slept together at least once if not more."

"You think so?" Hermione asked. She pulled her now soggy cereal back in front of her and waved her wand over the bowl vanishing just the cereal and poured a fresh helping over the milk. "He seemed very pleased to…how did he put it, "be short of her"?"

"She was very clingy."

"Yes, but per your explanation, he should have adored the attention."

"Different kind of attention. Not wanted on a constant, overwhelming basis." Hermione chewed her cereal and considered this. "I suppose. But growing up, I felt the same about my parents. They would fawn over everything that I could do, even if they didn't entirely understand it. I would often lock myself in my room just to get away."

"That's because you're brilliant and they were proud of their daughter. But I understand your point of view, coming from the opposite end of the spectrum." They sat in silence for a minute. Both glanced down the table to look at Ginny and Ron. She was saying something very serious to her brother judging from the way he was avoiding her eyes and the red tint to his ears.

"Can I ask you an honest question and you promise not to hex me for it?"

Hermione felt a small smile break free. "Sure, Harry. Go ahead."

"Would your relationship with Ron not working out really be a bad thing? I know you've considered it."

Hermione paused. Harry was right, she had considered it. Exactly what she had considered though was between her and the castle walls, though. "It's not what I imagined it would be. We've been together almost six months and it's like our relationship is exactly the same as it was before we became exclusive. We argue more than we get along. The only difference I see is that Ron is more possessive."

"He likes to call it being protective. But I think you're right. He has a territorial issue where you are concerned."

"It's aggravating." Hermione pushed her finished bowl of cereal away. "Are you going to eat?" She asked looking up at Harry. He gave her sheepish look and pulled a plate of toast toward him. "It's like he doesn't trust me to be my own person. I'm already having trouble trying to figure that out all over again. I thought I knew who I was. I spent years being comfortable in my own skin because I had you and Ron as the best friends in the world who didn't judge me because I always knew the answer, or had my work done first. I mean, I've always been that way. But when I first realized that I could do strange things, I was a total outcast in muggle school. When I found out that what I could do was magic, it was like a piece of myself that was missing clicked into place. This is where I belong." Hermione placed her hand on the table.

Harry knew she didn't mean right there at the Gryffindor table surrounded by her classmates, or even Hogwarts itself. She meant the Wizarding World.

"As far as who I belong with…" She trailed off, her eyes once more looking back up the table at Ron. For a moment, she considered asking Harry for advice, or at least his opinion on what would make Ron happy right now. But as soon as the thought crossed her mind it felt too weird. Besides, Harry had already admitted that Ron didn't discuss their relationship with him, so he really would have no context on which to base an opinion anyway.

Then her thoughts turned to Ginny. She would certainly have a better grasp on her brother and his personal likes and dislikes. But that felt even more awkward. Even though Ginny was her best girl friend, she was Ron's sister. Hermione imagined trying to ask her if Ron had any specific preferences that he may have mentioned when he was dating Lavender. But just trying to word out the question in her mind made Hermione feel a little queasy.

She lifted her eyes, noticing that Harry was concentrating on his toast and a copy of the morning (em)Prophet(/em) that an owl had delivered for him. She had considered several times buying him a new owl, but she knew there was no replacing Hedwig in his heart. She remembered the night when they retrieved Harry from Privet Drive and flown to The Burrow. He had pulled Hedwig's empty cage from the motorbike with tears running down his face. It took him days to finally clean it out. He kept the most pristine white feather he could find and permanently bound it to the page inside his photo album beside the first picture he had ever taken of his owl. It was truly one of the saddest things she had ever seen.

Breaking from the memory she glanced around the Great Hall. Her eyes eventually fell on the Slytherin table, finding Draco too easily because of his white blonde hair. Astoria Greengrass was sitting with him again, the two enjoying a lighthearted conversation by the looks of it. Connor Griffiths, another Slytherin sixth year came along, bending to whisper something in Astoria's ear. She smiled at her housemate and held up a finger indicating she needed another minute.

Hermione watched the two interact for the remainder of their time together. Draco clearly enjoyed her company, and it seemed so easy for him to converse and interact with the opposite sex. There had been other times when she had observed him in-between classes in the corridors. He never seemed to have any trouble relating to girls or perturbed by their presence. But that had been in previous years.

She started thinking. Was there something about those girls, or perhaps the way they acted or behaved around him that he liked? She had firsthand knowledge about the way Harry's and Ron's minds worked, having lived with them for almost a year in close quarters. But was what they liked about the opposite sex standard across the board for all males?

Draco might be worth asking for advice. However, he had not given her much reason to trust him other than that they got along well enough without hexing each other. And he didn't bully her anymore. But that was not enough for her to start gushing all her personal problems to someone who up until very recently had been nothing but a git to her for years. Even if he had apologized. She couldn't fathom leaving herself that vulnerable with no guarantee that Malfoy would either help her or not torment her because of her relationship troubles with Ron.

She would just have to make this work on her own.

# ~S~

The weekend before Halloween Draco and Hermione were both given off on tutoring duties in the library since so many students had opted to go into the village that Saturday. Draco spent it sleeping in and then had a very quiet breakfast in the Great Hall after said students had left. Granger wasn't in the library when he arrived there about an hour later. He chose a table toward the back, passing another table filled with Slytherin sixth and seventh years that had remained in the castle. One boy watched him from the moment Draco entered the library until he sat down. He noted that the Slytherin in question was a Prefect and it wasn't Griffiths. He couldn't recall the names of the seventh-year Prefects now, so he would check the roster when he got back to the Head Common Room later.

Draco was just starting his Ancient Runes work when Granger walked in looking a little tired and a lot annoyed. Her bushy hair seemed bushier because of the frustration on her face, which only intensified when she noticed him. What in Merlin's name had he done? He was just sitting here, working. Then it dawned on Draco. He had chosen the table that Granger was always sitting at. Well, it's not like her name was on it. They could share it. Hell, they shared a dormitory. Sharing a library table shouldn't be that much of a stretch.

Sit, Granger." Draco offered, starting to clear some space for her. "It's community space."

Hermione walked over and took the proffered seat. She dropped her bag to the floor, and he noticed that it didn't make its usual 'thud' on impact. She must have removed half the weight. "Sorry, I didn't mean to glare at you. I…I'm not having a good morning."

"I can tell. You certainly look angry. What did the Weasel do now?"

"Why would you assume it's Ron that's upset me?"

Draco began counting off on his fingers. "It's not a bad grade because you don't get them. A professor certainly hasn't gotten to you because you get along with all of them. And you couldn't possibly have forgotten to hand something in because it wasn't complete. You're always three days ahead if not a week. Which leaves the Weasel, because I can't think of anything else that you consider important that would get you _this_ upset."

Hermione said nothing in response to his nickname for Ron. She was either so angry with the redhead that she didn't care Draco was making fun of him, or she was just ignoring the insult.

"So, are you going to answer my question?"

"No, because it's none of your business, Malfoy." Hermione snapped. She reached down into her bag and took out her Ancient Runes work from Thursday's class. "Would you mind if we worked on this together? Without arguing? I've had enough of that to last me until Christmas."

Draco felt both of his eyebrows quirk. So, something (em)was(/em) going on between her and Weasley. 

He stored that bit of information away for later and pulled his books back in front of him. "Sure, Granger." He offered her what he hoped was a placating smile. She lifted her eyes to look at him from under her lashes, a small smile in place as well. If it was a peace offering, he would take it.

They had patrolling duties that night starting at ten with half the Prefects and three professors across the first four floors. The upper three were being patrolled by other professors and were so out of the way that extra coverage from additional Prefects was considered unnecessary.

Draco and Hermione patrolled separately on the second floor with the seventh-year Prefects from Slytherin and Ravenclaw. Draco broke off and took to his normal route past the classrooms toward a small balcony that was enclosed by arched, open windows which overlooked the sweeping lawns. It wasn't that high up on the second floor, but the vantage point offered a spectacular view of the sky. Draco had discovered it by accident in his sixth year and had come to it often when he needed to think.

He utilized it now for the same purpose. No one ever noticed that he wasn't fully patrolling the floor when he was assigned to it. So why not take advantage if no one would be the wiser to his absence?

Draco looked over his shoulder before turning the last corner and, not seeing anyone in the corridor behind him, headed for the suit of the armor that marked the turn towards the balcony.

But he never made it there. He was hit with a stinging hex in his back and fell to his knees. He didn't cry out, but his eyes burned with unshed tears from the sharp pain. He got up and whipped out his wand. " _Revelio_."

About six feet in front of him stood the seventh-year from the library that morning, Edwin Rivers. Draco had remembered to check the list, so he could put a name to the face. He didn't say anything but gave his housemate a good look over. He was one of the several Slytherins that was always glaring at him in the Great Hall whenever he sat down for a meal, as though Draco dared to think he belonged there.

Draco stood with his arms out, wand in his right hand. "Well, don't be a coward about it, Rivers."

He shot another hex at Draco, which Draco blocked easily. Rivers flung another hex, and another. Draco blocked each one, watching his opponent growing more and more frustrated each time he wasn't hit. He cast in rapid fire succession, and while Draco was a good duelist, able to block and cast when the spells were spaced apart, speed was never a strong suit for him. Rivers shot a binding jinx at him, which hit Draco in the chest and he collapsed to the floor, paralyzed.

"Not so arrogant are you now, rat?" Edwin spat at Draco's motionless form on the stone floor. "You think you can act as though we don't exist? Those families that your parents condemned to life imprisonment all because mommy Malfoy couldn't stand the thought that her darling son might be dead." He raised his wand. "Let's see how much mommy can protect you now." He opened his mouth to cast.

" _Incarcerous_!"

Hermione pointed her wand at Rivers and ropes shot from it, wrapping around the Slytherin. He cried out in surprise as he fell to his side on the floor beside Draco. Hermione rushed over and grabbed his wand. She performed the counter-curse on Draco, watching in relief as he blinked a few times and then began to sit up. She helped him attain a more upright position and handed him his wand, which had skittered across the floor when he fell. Draco started to stand, his eyes falling on Rivers, who was still struggling against the ropes binding him. He gave the Slytherin a hard stare, but said nothing, looking up when he heard footsteps coming up the corridor. Professors Snape and McGonagall came around the corner followed by the new Defense Professor, Bivens.

She took one look at the Head Boy and Girl, and to the Slytherin Prefect bound on the floor. "What happened?"

"Rivers attacked me." Draco stated. "Hermione stopped him before he could attack again."

Snape stepped forward and removed the ropes from Rivers, binding just his hands behind his back. Hermione handed him the Prefect's wand, and after asking Draco if he was truly all right, escorted the student away.

McGonagall nodded to the Head Girl. "Well done, Miss. Granger. But, Mr. Malfoy, if you could explain what brought on the attack?"

Draco did not want to go into detail about the stares at the Slytherin table, or the whispers in the corridors. "He must have followed me under a concealing charm and hexed me from behind. I don't know why, Professor. Perhaps he just hates me. He wouldn't be the only student in Hogwarts to feel that way." He said it devoid of feeling that he felt Hermione's eyes on him. Like she was questioning his mental state.

Professor McGonagall quirked an eyebrow at the Head Boy. "Why ever would you say that, Mr. Malfoy?"

"Because of my family. I assume they don't need much more reason than that."

McGonagall nodded again, understanding his point, but didn't question him further. "You may both go. Your patrolling duties for the evening may end early. Go back to your dormitory and get some rest."

Hermione and Draco began to walk off. "Mr. Malfoy." He turned at the sound of his name from the Transfiguration Professor. "If you need to speak to anyone I can let Professor Snape know."

"No, thank you, Professor. I'm not in need."

_Yes, you are, Draco_. Hermione thought as they turned again back down the corridor.

Once they were in the Head common room, Draco unfastened his robes and threw them on the couch. Hermione watched from where she stopped just inside the door. He sat down heavily on the sofa, hanging his head and shoving his hands into his hair.

For the first time, she realized that the brave face he always had on, the sneer and the cutting remarks, were all just a mask. His hands were shaking where they gripped the roots of his hair, pulling hard. She started to walk over to him, but Draco dropped his hands and let out a long breath.

"Just ask your question, Granger. Stop staring at me like I'm going to explode." He stated without turning around to look at her.

"Is everything all right?"

"What answer would you like, Granger?"

"The truth, preferably."

Draco sighed. The witch never made it easy. He knew she would say that as soon as the question left his mouth.

"No, things are not ok. And I don't want to talk about it right now."

Hermione nodded. She walked around the couch toward her door, avoiding his gaze.

"Thank you," Draco called out as her hand closed around the knob. Hermione turned, surprised. She was speechless for a moment when her eyes met his. "You're welcome, Draco." She offered him a reassuring smile and wished him a good night before disappearing behind her door.

Draco remained out on the couch for a while after Granger went to bed. He stared into the fire contemplating what had happened this evening. After Granger performed the counter-curse, freeing him from the body-bind, the first thing that came to his mind was wanting to curse Rivers into the next century. He had wanted to lash out, kick and punch the Slytherin snake until he was a crumpled, bleeding mess on the floor.

He had so much anger running through him right then that he was surprised he hadn't done something of the nature. The only thing he could think of that had stopped him was the fact that Granger was present. He didn't want to act that way in front of her. But when had he started to care about her feelings? It shouldn't have mattered to him that a display of violence my upset her. He was furious, and he had wanted to act on it.

But Draco had stopped himself. He had only glared down at Rivers. He hadn't even sworn at him. He had kept his temper when everything inside him was screaming with rage. He may not care that physically beating up another student (because cursing him would land Draco in Azkaban) would upset Granger, but he didn't want her to see him that way. It would only cause animosity between them. Draco would be lying to himself if he thought losing the tenuous peace between himself and the Head Girl wouldn't bother him.

They may not speak to each other often when together in the common room, but he liked her presence there. It reminded him that no matter how lonely he felt sometimes, he wasn't always alone. Granger didn't have to help him tonight. It had shocked him when he realized she was the one who had stopped Rivers from cursing him. He didn't deserve her help after the hell he had put her and her fellow Gryffindors through for years. Yet, she had come charging up the corridor and saved him from what he was sure was about to be excruciating pain.

Draco then remembered their conversation from the train. He had asked her to give him the benefit of the doubt that he was no longer the bastard he had been in his youth. Perhaps he had proven that one way or another to her. He may still tease her occasionally, but he certainly didn't bully her and call her foul names. He didn't even try to fight with her. They existed in companionable silence most of the time.

Draco wanted to know if this was truly the case. He wanted to ask Hermione about her motives, but not make her think he was complaining about her help. He was simply curious. But sometimes curiosity was not always a good thing.

"Better left alone." Draco muttered to himself. He rose from the couch and grabbed his robes.

He had thanked her.

That was enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone who has left kudos and comments so far. Please keep them coming! 
> 
> I know in the books that Harry explodes the sidecar that Hedwig’s cage was still in. I went with the film version where the sidecar survived. If Harry had brought the cage with him I believe he would have done what I described in the chapter.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long delay. I've been working on other fics and getting ready for my first con. I am going to try and stick to a weekend update going forward. But not this weekend coz I'll be at con. I'll try for Sunday night but no guarantees.

The following Tuesday evening Draco finished his rounds of the fourth floor and headed back down to the third. It was still early enough that he could get in some last-minute reading for tomorrow's Transfiguration lesson since McGonagall was going to be testing them on Vanishing Spells. He even considered asking Hermione if she would practice with him. She was far better at the spell than he, and a little extra help couldn't hurt. Even if it was coming from Granger.

He was contemplating how exactly he would present the idea to her as he was rounding the corner into the corridor where the Heads Dormitory was located. Except it wasn't vacated as he thought it would be. There were raised voices that sounded like Granger and Weasley. And they weren't exactly having a pleasant conversation. Draco stopped just behind one of the stone braziers where he couldn't be seen, his head tilted slightly so he could hear.

"Come on, Hermione. It's early still. We have a few hours left."

"I would love to spend time with you, Ron. But not in my dormitory. It wouldn't look right."

"What wouldn't look right about boyfriend and girlfriend spending time together in a dormitory."

Hermione sighed. "I mean you coming out in the morning, or later this evening. What if you get caught?"

"I'll just run back to Gryffindor Tower and get Harry's cloak."

Draco snorted to himself. _Why bother wasting the effort? If you're going back to Gryffindor, go together. I don't necessarily have to practice with Granger. But I would get to study in peace and not have to listen to any heavy panting from behind closed doors._

"Ron, if you're willing to go back to Gryffindor, we both might as well go. I'm sorry, but I'm saying no to my dormitory. It's one thing for me to come back here after being in Gryffindor Tower all night. I'm Head Girl. I must set an example. What would it look like if my boyfriend were caught sneaking back to his dorm after spending all night in mine? It would appear as though I'm abusing my status and granting special favors."

Draco peered around the corner. Hermione was standing facing down the corridor, but her eyes were on Ron, who was leaning against the wall. "But we know you're not. That's what matters, 'Mione." He reached out and tucked some hair behind her ear.

"Ron, what matters is responsibility. Let's just go back to Gryffindor. Like you said, it's early. We can get your dorm all to ourselves right now, I bet. I'll put up a Silencing Charm around the bed again, just in case."

Draco felt an eyebrow quirk. _Around the bed, Granger? I'm impressed._

"I'd rather have the privacy of your dorm, Hermione. The only person we need to worry about is Malfoy. And if he doesn't like what he hears he's got all of Slytherin House open to him."

"So, you're willing to inconvenience someone for your own gain?" Hermione asked, crossing her arms.

"I wouldn't put it that way. But it's not like he wouldn't have anywhere else to go if he was bothered."

_If only._ Draco thought.

"Look, Ron, I'm just not comfortable with it. I want to spend time with you now, but not here."

Ron shifted off the wall. "Then I guess it's just completely pointless, isn't it? I want to spend time with my girlfriend _alone_. Is that so much to ask?"

"No, Ron, it's not." Hermione reached for his hands, but Ron drew them away.

"Certainly seems to be. It's always 'no', every time I ask something. When is it ever going to be 'yes'?"

Hermione was taken aback. His tone wasn't cold or insulting. He sounded genuinely hurt. But she had said yes to him, on several occasions lately. They had done more together in the last few weeks then they did all summer. How could he complain? Because he wasn't getting exactly what he wanted right this instant? If that was the case, he was acting very juvenile in her opinion.

"I'm saying yes right now, Ron. Just not in my dorm."

"That's Hermione Granger, Head Girl talking. What does _my_ Hermione say?" Ron pressed.

" _Your_ Hermione?" She questioned.

Draco snorted again. Weasley didn't have a clue.

"What makes you think I'm any different now as Head Girl than I was in previous years? I was the responsible one when we were both made Prefects in fifth year, Ron. I'm still the same."

"Yeah, you are."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Look, I'm tired. You're tired. Let's just call it a night. I'll see you in classes tomorrow."

_That's it, Weasley, change the subject after you just insulted her_. Draco peeked around the corner of the brazier. The redhead was walking down the corridor toward him, head down and hands in his pockets. From the look on Granger's face he obviously had not given her a goodnight kiss and simply walked away.  
Draco ducked into the alcove behind the brazier and waited for Weasley to pass before sliding back out. Granger must have already gone in to the dormitory since she was no longer in the corridor when he rounded the corner a moment later.

He cast the nonverbal unlocking charm and whispered the password. The door clicked open softly and he went inside, shutting it behind him. It clicked again as it locked. Granger was standing by the fire, arms wrapped around her middle. Her robes were draped over the back of the couch and an open bottle of butterbeer sat on the mantle.

She looked up as he walked in, and quickly lifted one hand to wipe under her eyes. Draco took a moment to unfasten his robes and slipped out of them, draping them next to Granger's. She grabbed her drink from the mantle and downed the rest of it before setting the bottle back down. Draco sat on the far arm of the couch watching her, arms crossed over his chest.

"I suppose if you're coming in this quickly behind me you heard some of what happened." She stated.

_More than some_. "I might have caught the end of it."

"I'm sure you found it very entertaining."

"Not really. But if you needed me to, I could go teach Weasley a lesson in tact and good manners." He recalled his curiosity in her motives from the previous week and thought if he moved the conversation in the right direction she would divulge them. Even though he had already told himself it didn't matter, he was still genuinely curious, although at this juncture he would call it being nosy since he was asking about her personal life.

Hermione didn't respond at first. She let out a deep breath and turned finally to face him. "Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why would you do that for me?"

"Because I owe you for helping me last week." Draco answered honestly and waited a moment for her to respond. But she didn't. "Why _did_ you help me, Granger?"

She shrugged one shoulder. "That's just who I am." She stated, walking over and sitting on the couch. "And you did ask me to give you the benefit of the doubt. So far, this year you've given me no reason to think badly of you, but that doesn't mean that I trust you. It just means that I believe you."

Draco considered this and decided to accept it. It was fair. Very Hufflepuff.

"What happened to make that student attack you in the first place?"

Ah, there was that Gryffindor brashness.

Draco stared at her for a moment. He knew she couldn't help the boldness, and she was just as curious by nature as he was. But he didn't feel like talking about it.

"Just some bad blood between us."

"Does that have anything to do with how detached you've been lately?"

_Noticed that, did you, Granger? I guess it wasn't so hard to._

Draco shrugged one shoulder. "Not entirely."

If he didn't want to talk she wouldn't force him. Hermione got up and grabbed her robes from the back of the couch. "If you need to talk, Draco, I'm here." She walked toward her room then.

"Same goes for you with Weasley." Draco called out.

Hermione turned sharply at her door, looking a little surprised and embarrassed. But she fixed her expression into a small, grateful smile, nodded at him and wished him a good night before disappearing.

Once her door was shut Draco flopped onto his back on the couch and stared up at the ceiling. Had his relationship with Granger just taken a turn toward actual friendship? He wasn't so sure if he liked the idea. But it made him smile nonetheless.

Hermione stood with her back to her door, her head thrown back and her eyes shut. She could feel a migraine coming on and knew she needed to get some rest tonight. But after what Draco had just said, offering to teach Ron manners because they had been lacking out in the corridor, she knew sleep would elude her. It was a statement she never expected to hear from Draco Malfoy. He offered to protect her honor. No. He offered to defend it. The admission, if that was what it was, made her head spin and Hermione stepped away from her door feeling dizzy.

Why would Draco, of all people, feel the need to confront someone on her behalf because they were rude to her? It made no sense. But it did go along with what he had told her on the train September 1st. Up until now he had down nothing to show her that he was…How had he put it? No longer a bastard? She supposed he had shown that this evening, but like she said, it wasn't enough to make her trust him. He could just be teasing her. Tying to insult her in an indirect way.

But why would he start now when he hadn't done anything of the sort since term began? Hermione sat down on her bed, dropping her robes to the floor. She was highly tempted to go up to Madame Pomfrey for some headache relief potion, but in all honestly she just didn't have it in her to walk all the way to hospital wing and back this late. No matter how much her head was pounding. She flopped back onto her bed and shut her eyes trying to focus on something, anything, else other than the genuine tone of Draco's voice when he made his offer only minutes before.

It made no sense for him to care.

No sense at all.

# ~S~

Hermione decided to let the argument between her and Ron go. It wasn't going to do them any good if left to linger. She made a concentrated effort to be as attentive to her boyfriend over the course of the next week as she could. If he wanted to go outside once classes were done for the afternoon and sit by the lake, she went with him, letting her bag lay untouched beside them. If he wanted to sit in the Gryffindor common room and play Exploding Snap, or Wizard Chess, she sat with him and let him try to teach her.

But even though they spent more time together in the following days, Ron was distant from her emotionally. Hermione tried to be more affectionate with him, hoping it may help, but Ron seemed withdrawn. He didn't want to spend as much time alone, opting to stay amongst their friends. She wondered if she had upset him enough that he was holding a grudge against her refusal for them to be alone in the Head dormitory together. It didn't bother her so much that he was angry with her decision, but that he was allowing it to come between them like this, if that was even the case. She didn't know. And when she tried to ask, Ron just complained that he was tired and went to bed.

Hermione feared the he was losing interest. There had to be something she could do, but short of indulging in his every want, which she would not do, she couldn't think of anything. Harry had had a point, that Ron was acting like a spoiled child. And she wasn't about to condone the behavior, let alone encourage it.

She had already bashed the ideas of talking to Ginny and Harry. Too awkward. And she had tried at least a half dozen times to talk to Ron, but he always shut down the conversation before it had a chance to happen. Maybe she should just do something spontaneous. Surprise him. 

But what?

Maybe she _should_ talk to Ginny. She would at least have some idea of what boys liked, and maybe some suggestions. But…ugh. Going to her boyfriend's younger sister for advice on how to please him? The thought left such a foul taste in her mouth. But Hermione knew she was braver than that. She was a bloody Gryffindor for crying out loud.

She waited until late Friday night, nine days since their argument in the corridor. She would only have a few minutes' time to talk to Ginny before having to show up for patrol duty with Draco. Hopefully it would be enough time to ask the questions she needed to ask and not make too much of a fool of herself. Harry had already gone to bed, wanting to get an extra couple of hours sleep before Quidditch practice in the morning, and recommended to Ginny and Ron to do the same. Ron agreed, but Ginny was staying down in the common room to finish an essay. Actual she was staying behind to speak with Hermione, but Harry didn't need to know that.

"When is the first game again?" Hermione asked after Harry had disappeared upstairs. She began packing away her books, so she would be ready to leave when she had to.

"Next Saturday. We'll be ready for Slytherin. Harry has come up with some excellent tactics and moves based on the team this year. I was shocked that Malfoy didn't turn up for tryouts."

"He quit. Not enough time with everything else."

Ginny pushed her completed essay away from her. "True. So, what's going on between you and my brother?" She asked, her tone casual as well as her posture as she let her head rest in her hand.

"I'm not really sure anymore, Ginny. The summer was tense, and then we returned to Hogwarts and it was a little shaky the first week. But then we hit a stride with each other, and things have been great. I'm so much more comfortable with him than I was a few months ago. But there are still some things I'm not ready for. I'm sure that's why he wants us to be as alone as possible. To make it easier, more private."

"Ron is very considerate of your feelings in that regard. I'm glad he stopped pressuring you finally. I was about to whack him over the head with my broomstick if he kept that up."

Hermione let out a breath, checking her watch. She still had a solid half hour before she needed to report for patrol duty. "I'm willing to try things with him. But…I don't know. I guess I don't feel that confident in asking him what he likes."

Ginny grinned. "He's a boy, it's easy. Just, and I know this is going to sound weird because he's my brother but hear me out, just rub his dick and play with it more. All boys like that. And trust me when I say that he'll be eternally grateful for any attention you give him between his legs. I know, yuck to discuss with his younger sister, but speaking from experience just go for it. It will help with your confidence, too. If you're not sure then just ask him to show you what he likes."

A thought popped into Hermione's head and she couldn't help voicing it. "And I suppose he would know that from that his own experience."

Ginny waved a dismissive hand in the air. "All boys touch themselves if they're desperate enough to get off. I'm positive Ron has, too. But he'll never talk about it, and neither will Harry." She leaned back in her chair and folded her arms, "Not that I expect him to, of course. But some of the conversations we've had…well, let's just say I know him a lot better now than I did a year ago." She smiled mischievously.

Hermione erupted into giggles. "Oh, Ginny! Too much information. I do not need that visual in my head."

"No, you need a visual of getting Ron off in your head. And try not to think about anything he may or may not have done with Lavender. That's not going to help you. Let him guide you, if you need it, and just have a good time with him."

Hermione was shocked that the youngest Weasley could say all of this and not break out in a blush to rival the color of her hair. It was by far the most embarrassing conversation she had had with her best friend. But she was glad she had done so. Ginny was right. She just had to go for it with Ron. Catch him off his guard and really show him what she wanted. She just needed to know from him that he was serious about their relationship. That he wanted to make it work as much as she did.  
The following day, after her tutoring duties in the library, she dropped her bag off in the Head common room and went up to Gryffindor tower. Harry and Ginny, freshly showered from the looks of them, were situated at the study table closest to the fire, an Astronomy text book between them as they poured over a star chart together.

"Hi," she called as she walked in. "How was practice?"

"Excellent." Ginny enthused. "Ron made some fantastic saves. We're definitely going to be handing Slytheirn their asses next week."

Harry grinned at his girlfriend. Leave it to her to say exactly what he was thinking, exactly the way he wanted to say it. He rubbed Ginny's back and she turned to him, bright smile still in place. Hermione loved seeing the two of them together. They had such an easy rapport with each other. Then again, they had both been through a lot of the same hell and had come out of it stronger together. She didn't envy them, but she wished what she had with Ron was similar. Simple, but by no means easy.

"Where is Ron?"

"Upstairs in the shower still." Harry informed her.

That gave Hermione an idea, but she didn't know if she could follow through on it. The whole surprise factor was easy enough. He wasn't expecting her. But when she allowed her thoughts to go a little further as she climbed the stairs to the boys’ dormitory, she felt her nerves fire and her stomach twist.

Harry and Ron shared the room with two other boys from their year that had returned to finish. Neville and Dean. Seamus had already moved back home and was working now. And from what Harry and Ron heard from him, he was doing very well with his entertainment shop that specialized in pyrotechnic magic and potions.

The shower was still running when she opened the door to the dormitory. Having seen Neville in the library when she left earlier, and knowing Dean was also downstairs in the common room, Hermione felt a little more confident about being alone with Ron in the dormitory for what she had planned. She wasn't so sure about just barging into the bathroom and interrupting his shower. But she was more than ok sitting on his bed to wait for him.

She locked the dormitory door then removed her robes and draped them over the chair by Ron's bed and removed her shoes. She sat on the side, facing the bathroom and leaned back on her hands to wait for him. The shower turned off a couple minutes later and she heard movement on the other side of the door. Hermione sat up, crossed her ankles and folded her hands in her lap. She didn't know why she was taking up such a proper posture, but it felt comfortable to her.

Ron opened the bathroom door and stopped in his tracks, his hand pausing in towel drying his hair. Hermione was sitting on his bed, apparently waiting for him. He dropped the spare towel and cleared his throat, making sure the towel around his hips was secure.

"Uh, hi, Hermione. Wasn't expecting you to be in here."

"That's the point." She smiled at him. It wasn't demure or mischievous, but somewhere in the middle. Like she knew something he didn't.

"It's a nice surprise." He returned her grin and walked over to his bed. "Was there something you wanted to talk about?" He asked as he sat down beside her.

"No, I came up here to see you. I thought we could spend some time together."

Ron broke out in a huge grin then. He leaned in and kissed Hermione, reaching both hands out to hold her waist and pull her against him. She let out a sound of surprise, but let Ron bring her closer. She reached up to hold his shoulders as she began to kiss him back. His skin was still warm from the shower and she could smell his body wash.

Ron moaned against her mouth as he pushed Hermione down to the bed. She surprised him further by letting him lay against her so that their hips were flush and he could push himself against her. Hermione liked the sensation. It wasn't the first time he had done it. But it was the first time that she was going with her feelings and not letting Ron lead.

In the end it was a successful experiment, emotionally wise. They lay facing each other on Ron's bed. He had shed the towel and was covered by his blanket up to his hips. Hermione was still clothed, except for her stockings. She had her bare legs tangled with Ron's under the blanket, one hand in his ginger hair playing with it as it slid through her fingers.

"I enjoyed that." Ron sighed, shutting his eyes.

Hermione had managed to overcome her hesitation in what she had wanted to do but fear still gripped her in the act and she had faltered. Ron had commented on it at the time. Not to insult her, she was sure, but it still echoed inside her head and now she wasn't entirely certain she liked the whole idea. _Don't let a bad first try get you down, Granger_. Hermione told herself. But it wasn't that simple. Failure, at anything, was her biggest fear. She didn't like it, any form of it. Plain and simple.

"I'm glad." Hermione responded. "That was my goal."

Ron sighed again and moved a little closer to her. Hermione let him, laying her forehead against his. She pulled her wand out and unlocked the dormitory door, then waved it over them to shut the curtains around the bed. Ron was asleep in moments, snoring lightly. She smiled at him as she watched him, her fingers still playing with his hair.

The next week progressed steadily as the days careened towards the first Quidditch match of the season. Ron and Hermione didn't get as much time together at night since he was at practice until just before the sun went down and then came in to dinner, exhausted and filthy. All he wanted most nights was a hot meal and a hotter shower. Instead of trying to find time alone he and Hermione spent a lot of time in the common room with Harry and Ginny.

Hermione had been complaining about her neck and right shoulder being stiff and achy. Ron had her sit sideways on the couch between his legs while tried to rub out the knots that she had. He and Harry had both told her on numerous occasions that she carried around too much in her bag. But she never listened. Ginny had grabbed her bag after Hermione walked into the common room on Thursday evening and dropped it on the floor. It clunked loudly when she set it down, which had piqued Ginny's curiosity in the first place.

"How many books do you have in here, Hermione?" Ginny asked her best friend as she began unpacking the bag.

Hermione was already situated on the couch, her robes and sweater over the back of it, and Ron was working his second and third knuckle in and around her right shoulder blade through her blouse.

"All of them. When I'm not in class I'm in the library. It's just easier to keep everything with me. I tried to take things out and lighten it, but then I had a panic attack when I realized my Charms book wasn't in there when I went to the library on Monday. So, I just started keeping everything with me again."

"And you keep your cauldron in here why?" Ginny asked as she took the item out. Shrunk inside of it was Hermione's ingredient chest. "You can't possibly have room for all of this."

"Undetectable extension charm." Hermione didn't know why she hadn't thought of it before. She had so much else on her mind that the weight of her bag was the last thing she was usually worried about.

"Not that again." Harry moaned from the floor, looking up from his Herbology text to roll his eyes. "Please don't tell me you're keeping a bloody tent in there. Just in case you need to camp in the library right?" He teased, glancing over his shoulder at Hermione.

_That was good_ , Ron thought. He chuckled behind Hermione and she suppressed the urge to give Harry a very rude hand gesture. Instead she only glared at him. "You all sound like, Draco. He gives me hell about it, too."

Ron stopped rubbing her shoulder for a moment. "Is he rude to you?"

"No, not at all. He can be a real prat sometimes, but he's never rude to me."

All three fell silent around her. "What?" Hermione asked looking from Ron, to Ginny, to Harry.

"Can you repeat that?" Harry asked.

"Draco is never rude to me?"

"Wow," Ginny breathed, sounding impressed. "Malfoy, a decent human being."

"Well, we already knew this, didn't we?" Hermione asked.

"I still don't trust him." Ron muttered as he returned to rubbing her back. But Hermione turned so she was facing him.

"What do you mean you still don't trust him? He saved all of our lives last spring."

"Yeah, and then fucking Goyle had to go and try to kill us all and Malfoy did nothing to stop him. Then he _willingly_ went over to the Death Eater's side."

"But if he hadn't, Voldemort would have killed him, Ron." Harry interjected. "He didn't have a choice there."

"You always have a choice." Ron retorted. "And he made all the wrong ones. I don't care what you guys say. He's a Slytherin, and you can't trust the lot of them."

Hermione looked at him, aghast. "I don't believe you, Ron. After everything we've all been through and seen. What about Professor Snape? He was a Slytherin. Do you trust him now?"

Ron shrugged. "Maybe a little. But I wouldn't put my life in his hands. He _was_ a Death Eater after all."

Harry turned over his shoulder to look at his friend and said very seriously, "Ron, my life _was_ in his hands. And I'm still here."

Ron didn't respond to that.

"Ron, you realize these feelings you have against Slytherins are no better than how they feel about muggle-borns." Hermione stated.

"Don't you dare compare me to them like that, Hermione. I would never call you such a foul name."

Hermione stood up, her frustration getting the better of her. "I'm not talking about name-calling, Ronald. I'm talking about biased feelings. And you have them. You hate all Slytherins just because of their house. Why?"

"This is so pointless." Ron muttered. "I really don't feel like getting in to this with you, Hermione. The next thing you're going to start arguing about is House Elves and I just don't want to hear it tonight." Ron shoved off the couch. "I'm going to bed."

Hermione watched him go, flabbergasted. How had such a nice night turned sour so quickly. Harry and Ginny had been attempting to have a conversation. And even though Draco was sometimes a sensitive subject for Ron because he was Hermione's roommate number one, a Slytherin and a former Death Eater number two, she still felt it was ok to discuss how he was no longer the same person.

But Ron had taken it to a level where it didn't need to go. And now they had had another row. When things were just hitting a stride for them once more. Hermione didn't know what to do, so she began packing her bag back up and grabbed her robes and sweater before wishing Harry and Ginny a good night and left Gryffindor Tower.

Draco was sitting in the armchair by the fire reading a Quidditch magazine when she returned. She muttered a good night to him and locked her bedroom door once she was inside. After a hot shower and getting dressed in her most comfortable pajamas, Hermione curled up in her bed and let her mind wander. She was beginning to feel a pattern emerge between her and Ron. Everything would be fine for a few weeks, but then something would happen, a comment, an event, something she did…whatever. It would set him off and they would argue and shout at each other.

She didn't want to be in a relationship where more time was spent fighting and being apart than being with each other. Maybe Harry was right. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad if things didn't work out between her and Ron. But no matter how hard she tried to convince herself of that, Hermione just couldn't let Ron go.

The following morning, she went down to breakfast and took her usual seat beside Ron. He was already digging in to a plate loaded with eggs and sausage looking over a N.E.W.T.s pamphlet. "Morning," She greeted him pleasantly.

"Morning," Ron responded through a mouthful. He chewed, swallowed, and set the pamphlet down. "Sorry about last night, 'Mione. I didn't mean to snap at you. I'm just starting to feel really nervous about the match tomorrow."

Hermione offered him a small smile. _I wish you wouldn't try and blame it on stress and just be honest with me_. She thought but saying that right now wasn't going to help. "I understand, Ron." She laid her hand over his, then leaned in and kissed his cheek. He turned so he could kiss her back, keeping it brief.

"What are your plans tonight?"

"I have to study in the library and try to get my Ancient Runes work done, and then I have rounds at ten."

"I'll study with you." Ron offered.

"I'd like that."

Thus, four Gryffindors found themselves sequestered in the library that evening after dinner. Four different classes worth of work spread out on the table. They had already been there for almost two hours and Ron had already given up on his Charms essay. Harry was very diligently finishing his Transfiguration homework and Ginny was nearly done with her Astronomy chart. Hermione pulled her Ancient Runes text toward her and then looked over to her copy of _Spellman's Syllabary_ to check her translation.

"Oh, Merlin, I forgot." She moaned, pushing back from the table. "Professor Babbling told us we needed a different text for this. I'll be right back."

"How much longer are we staying?" Ron asked as Hermione got up.

She glanced at her watch. It was only nine. She still had at least forty-five minutes before she needed to leave so she could drop off her bag first and then report with Draco. She knew Harry was going to want the team in bed by ten, so everyone would be rested.

"Forty minutes?" Hermione asked, looking around at the three at the table.

Harry nodded. "That's reasonable."

Ron huffed a sigh. He wanted to take Hermione back to his dorm hoping that tonight, considering how the past few weeks had gone between them behind closed doors, that she may finally be ready to go all the way with him. He needed the release before tomorrow morning, not that that was the most important thing, but he wanted to at least get a repeat of last Sunday.

"What?" Hermione asked.

"I was kind of hoping we could go back to Gryffindor a little early. Maybe have some time for… you know…us."

Hermione knew exactly what he was getting at. Not that she was opposed to the idea, she was completely open to it. But it was the night before the first game, and Harry, Ron and Dean all shared a dormitory. She didn't think the boys would be very open to being kept up for hours because of certain noises from a few beds down. And even if she were to cast another silencing charm, they would still all know what she and Ron had been doing when Harry woke them all up the next morning. And her dorm was out of the question. Harry would squash that before the suggestion even left Ron's mouth.

"I don't think tonight is a good night for that, mate." Harry said to Ron. "We all need our sleep. Not that I don't condone it or anything. But I want you to be able to focus tomorrow and not be thinking about things that you did the night before."

Hermione blushed scarlet and took the opportunity to disappear into the shelves and find her book.

# ~S~

Draco had decided to come to the library tonight and finish up his Ancient Runes work as well so he could devote the rest of the weekend to the stack of Arithmancy equations that Professor Vector had so kindly bestowed upon the seventh years on Wednesday. He had abandoned his parchment after writing out the translation to retrieve the necessary book and was skimming the shelf for it. When he saw the title of the text he required he reached for it, turning when he heard the heavy sigh at the end of the aisle.

"Of course, you're here doing the same work I am." Hermione huffed at him.

"Ancient Runes?" Draco asked, pulling the book down and setting it on the extended shelf in front of him.

Hermione nodded, crossing her arms. "May I look at it as well?"

"Of course, I'm not going to keep you from it." Draco waved her over as he opened the book. He flipped through to the section they needed and started running his fingers down the page. "Here," He pointed out the notes on the translation they had been assigned.

Hermione took a moment to read, jotting some things down on a small piece of parchment with one of the library quills. She set it back into its ink pot and folded up the parchment placing it in her pocket.

"Thank you, Draco. I appreciate it."

"You're welcome." He smiled at her, just a closed-mouth smile. A careful smile. "Is everything ok? You seemed upset last night."

"Fine, everything is fine."

"You're terrible at lying."

Hermione felt a little heat creep into her cheeks. "It's nothing, really. But thank you for asking." She turned and started to walk away, but as she reached the end of the aisle she turned back around. "How is everything with you? Whatever happened to Rivers?"

"He has detention every Saturday until Christmas break. And everything is fine with me, too, Granger." Draco nodded.

"Good. Good. That's…good. I'm glad things are better for you."

"Why are you acting like this?" Draco asked, leaning against the table and crossing his arms over his chest. "You would think we'd just met and haven't been sharing a dorm for almost two months."

"What do you mean?"

"You're acting as though you barely know me. Rather, as though you haven't seen me in a long time."

"Well, it has been a hectic week."

Draco gave her a look that said he didn't believe her excuses at all. "Granger, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, I need to go." She turned and walked out of the aisle. Draco grabbed the book and followed her. He nearly knocked her over in the next aisle when he realized she had stopped suddenly and was standing at the end.

"What are you doing?" He hissed at her.

But Hermione didn't respond. She was still, keeping herself hidden around the corner of the bookshelf. Draco could hear voices on the other side, voices that belonged to Potter and the Weasel. Hermione stood there listening, and he didn't know if she was aware that he stood just behind her, able to hear everything that she could.

"Do you think it's odd that Hermione still won't…you know…with me?" Ron asked in a low voice.

Ginny and Harry both looked up from their work in surprise. Ron never discussed his relationship with Hermione.

"I don't think here is the best place to discuss that, Ron." Harry responded in a whisper.

"Yeah, you're right. I'm just thinking out loud." Ron was silent for a moment, considering the question. It bothered him enough that he wanted an answer, or at least an opinion. And right now, he was desperate enough for either that he leaned in and asked again anyway. "But it is odd, isn't it? We've been together six months. I mean, it didn't even take six weeks when I was dating Lavender."

"Ron, we don't want to hear about your ex-girlfriend." Ginny huffed. "Besides, weren't you glad when things ended?"

"Yeah, but only because she was starting to get on my nerves wanting to snog every five minutes."

"So, don't sound like you miss it so desperately." Harry interjected. "And as far as Hermione goes, don't pester her about it. It'll happen in its own time. I know you have more respect for her than you did for Lavender."

Ron did. But based on how the past few weeks had been going between him and Hermione, he felt confident that if he brought up the topic of sex now, she would be more open to it. She seemed much more comfortable with him about her sexuality than she had been all summer. And he was eager to move on to the next step with her.

"You're right. I was just kind of hoping tonight might be the night. You know, with the game tomorrow and all. I could really use the stress relief."

Hermione's eyes widened but she didn't make a sound. Was that how he was really going to treat their first time together? Something that should be treasured between a couple that loves each other, especially for her since it would be her first time, as a casual fling because he needed some relief the night before the first game?

Hermione refused to believe that. Ron cared more for her emotions than to just toss them aside and treat them as something trivial. She still struggled some with putting herself back together. This was a moment between them that she wanted to be right. Not rushed. Not something they should do just for the sake of finally doing it. And how could he compare them to his relationship with Lavender?

Hermione knew she had been right in supposing that he was basing them now off what he had had with their fellow Gryffindor. It made her heart crack a little to think that Ron felt she wasn't good enough. But that couldn't be the case here. Could it? Was he thinking of possibly getting back together with if Hermione couldn't give him what he wanted?

She felt tears sting her eyes and gasped out loud when a hand touched her shoulder.

"Hermione?"

She turned, shock coursing through her. Not because Draco was there. But because he had said her name. Her _first_ name. She looked up at him, ashamed that he had overheard everything Ron just said. It was more than embarrassing, it was mortifying. Her personal life on display for Draco to witness. But he wasn't looking at her with any kind of malice. He looked concerned.

Draco knew she was upset but was impressed that she didn't cry. Not that he expected Granger to ever cry in front of him. But the regard with which Weasley just treated her made him sick. Draco may have been a real bastard in the past, but he never would have aired a friend's personal business like that. Teasing and name-calling was one thing, and he knew it was wrong, but he was raised with the understanding that there were some things that just weren't done.

And Weasley was now guilty of one of them.

"I don't know what to say." She whispered.

"Do you want to leave?"

Hermione nodded. "I…I can't…" She tried to say, but words failed her. She was just too stunned with Ron and his brash words. She couldn't fault his Gryffindor tendencies, but she could blame him for the subject matter.

"I'll get my bag. Wait here."

Draco returned to his table, but he had to walk out from the aisle to do it. Harry, Ron, and Ginny all glanced at him as he passed the table. He was tempted to punch the older Weasley in the throat, but he held himself back. He wasn't going to win any points with Granger right now for that, even if it would have been in her defense.

He grabbed his bag from the table and stuffed his books back inside it. As he walked back over he noticed that Hermione was already at the table packing up her things. She still wasn't crying, but it would take a blind man to miss the way her hands shook, or how pale she had gone. Potter's girlfriend was watching her, concerned. But she turned to her brother with an expression of pure contempt on her face.

"I thought you said your patrolling duties don't start until ten." Ron asked, dumbfounded as to why Hermione would want to leave the library early.

"We have to see Professor McGonagall first to go over the new schedules." Draco stated, walking up. "I don't mean to steal her away, but we need to go." The lie came easily, and he delivered it in a clear, matter-of-fact voice that left no room for argument.

Ron reached for Hermione's hand as she finished packing her last book. "See you in the morning before the game?" He asked.

Hermione didn't say anything. She didn't even look at him. She just gave the smallest nod she could manage and pulled her hand from his to settle the strap of her bag over her shoulder. Draco followed her out of the library and they were silent as they walked back to the third floor side by side. He unlocked the door to their dormitory and let Hermione go in first. He turned to shut the door, and then back around intent on asking her if there was anything he could do. But she had already gone into her room. So silently he didn't even hear the door close.

But a large chunk of wood was not enough to drown out the sound of her sobs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and sticking with my pitiful updates so far. I appreciate all the kudos or comments you want to drop. Constructive criticism is welcome. I am sure this still needs polishing no matter how many times I go over it.


	5. Chapter 5

Draco stood outside Hermione's door the following morning listening for movement. He heard nothing and was a little concerned after what he had witnessed in the library the night before. Then again, she may still be sleeping. She had cried for almost an hour after they returned to their dormitory. He'd sent a note to McGonagall telling her that Hermione was not feeling well, and he didn't want to leave her alone. He received a message back quickly that they were both excused for the evening but would have to report for patrol duty the following evening instead, and it was highly suggested that Miss Granger should see Madame Pomfrey. Draco had tossed the missive into the fire then shut himself in his room. He crossed the bathroom to Granger's door and sat there listening until her sobs subsided and then went to bed.

Her room was still silent five minutes later when he finally moved away from the door and decided to head down to breakfast. As he approached the entrance into the Great Hall, Potter and his girlfriend came into view as they walked down from the seventh floor, dressed in their scarlet and gold Quidditch robes.

"Hey, Weasley." Draco called out as they reached the door.

Ginny and Harry both turned, Harry narrowing his eyes at the Slytherin. "What's the problem, Malfoy?"

"No problem." Draco stopped in front of the couple. "I need to talk to your girl."

Harry narrowed his eyes again. Ginny picked up on the tension coming off her boyfriend and touched his shoulder. "It's ok, I can handle him. Go on and eat. I'll be along in a minute."

Harry gave her a quick once over, kissed her on the cheek, and walked into the hall.

The younger Weasley watched him go and then turned to Draco with her arms crossed over her chest. "My name is Ginny. Ginevra, if you must know. But Ginny will suffice. And don't think about trying anything. I'm sure you remember my proficiency with the Bat-Bogey Hex." Ginny watched in satisfaction as Malfoy shuttered a little.

Draco did remember, and he didn't fancy the sensation of a dozen or more bats flying out of his nostrils just then. "I'm not going to try anything, _Ginevra_. I need your help."

Ginny felt her eyes widen in shock and her arms loosened a little. "I never thought I would see the day. And why should I help you, Malfoy?"

"It's about Granger."

Again, Ginny's eyes widened in surprise, but her face softened at the thought of her best friend and the heartache she must have felt, and was probably still feeling, because of her prat of a brother. "Oh. In that case let's step over here." Ginny indicated an alcove to their right that was out of the way of the mainstream traffic going into the Great Hall and that would provide a little more privacy.

Draco felt the corner of his mouth twitch up in what he hoped was a grateful smile. He had gambled on the idea that if he came right out with his reason why he needed to talk to her she would be more willing to help him. He was glad it paid off.

"You heard everything Ron said in the library last night, didn't you?" Ginny asked in a quiet voice once they were no longer surrounded by their fellow students.  
"I was right next to her the whole time." Draco confirmed.

"So, you made up that line about needing to meet with McGonagall before patrol duty to get her out of the library?"

Draco nodded. "She shut herself in her room when we got back to the dorm and hasn't come out since."

Ginny sighed and rubbed her forehead. "I'm going to kill my brother. I can't believe he said those things last night. I don't know what's gotten into him. The last few years it's just been me and him at home and my mum has spoiled him with ten years' worth of affection and attention. That and after his relationship with Lavender he's used to getting what he wants. She did everything he asked."

"I take it you never had to compete with your older brothers for mommy's attention, did you?"

Ginny shook her head. "No. Being the youngest and the only girl made it easy for me to constantly be on display and under my parents' eyes. Now Ron essentially has my mum's attention all to himself. Not that I don't love her, but she can be smothering at times." Ginny waved a dismissive hand in the air. "But we're not here to talk about that. We're here for Hermione. She didn't say _anything_ last night?"

Draco shook his head. "No, and as far as I know she's probably still in her room."

Ginny looked over Draco's shoulder to see if Harry was coming to look for her yet. But he wasn't, and she moved her eyes back to Malfoy. "Harry gave Ron hell last night about what he said about Hermione, but I don't think he heard any of it because he responded with, "it's Hermione, she'll get over it". Except…she won't. At least not right away the way Ron is imagining she will. He may have just erected the highest wall yet between them."

"He's a fool." Draco stated angrily, surprising himself with the intensity of it.

Ginny was surprised by the defensive tone in Malfoy's voice. He kicked his foot at the floor and a small piece of loose stone skittered away toward the staircase. Ginny wondered if the blonde was imagining it to be her brother's head. Merlin knew she certainly wanted to knock some sense into his cranium.

"He is." Ginny agreed, and smirked when she caught Draco raising one eyebrow at her in surprise. "I don't think he realizes how much he hurt her last night. And Harry even said to him not to be surprised if Hermione doesn't show up at the game today." Ginny paused to look over Draco's shoulder again, seeing Harry now standing at the entrance of the Hall watching her.

"I need to go. I'll talk to Harry, but…let me know if she says anything or if she comes out of her room today."

"I will." Draco promised.

"You could try and talk to her, too, Draco. I think she trusts you."

Draco snorted. "She hasn't been very forthcoming yet."

"Try a different approach." Ginny suggested. "If she never said anything to you while you were standing there listening to Ron, and then let you come up with an excuse for her to leave, she trusts you on some level. Ok, I really need to go. Harry is coming over."

Draco turned to see Potter walking in their direction, a less than pleased expression on his bespectacled face. He turned to face his former rival, with a wide grin. "I'm all done with her, Potter. She's yours again. Go on and make sure she's fed and watered."

Ginny scowled at Draco as she passed him and grabbed Harry's hand pulling him back toward the Great Hall.

"Oh, Malfoy." Ginny called at the entrance. "She likes toast." And the younger Weasley disappeared into the Hall, Potter right on her tail.

Draco felt his brows furrow in confusion. But a moment later he understood. He went into the Hall and grabbed a stack of toast from the Slytherin table and wrapped it in a few napkins. He glanced at the Gryffindor table on his way out catching sight of the Weasel. He was nose deep in a magazine and shoveling food into his mouth as though nothing was wrong in the world.

Draco returned to the third floor fuming. He was surprised the toast survived the journey. He was even more surprised upon reaching the dormitory to find Hermione's door unlocked when he tried to twist the knob. But instead of just barging in, he knocked first.

"Come in, Draco."

He turned the knob and stuck his head inside the room. Hermione was sitting up in bed, her legs covered by the blanket, with a book in her hands. Tissues lay scattered around her, the box on the nightstand within reach. He watched Hermione go for her wand next to her on the bed and she banished the used tissues to the waste bin in the corner.

"What time is it?" She asked as she fixed the blanket around her.

"Almost ten." Draco answered, opening the door a little more and stepping in to the room. "How long have you been up?"

"About an hour. Are you going to the match?"

"Even if I wanted to, I doubt I would be welcomed amongst my housemates."

Hermione regarded him, confused. This was news.

"Want to take a walk around the lake with me? I have toast." Draco held up the napkin-wrapped bundle in his hands.

Hermione felt the corner of her mouth twitch up in a small smile as she considered the offer. She had been planning on staying in bed all day getting ahead on homework. But a walk might do her some good. Besides, the rest of the school would be down at the Quidditch pitch and they would have privacy no matter where they walked.

"Sure, Draco."

"I'll meet you out in the common room."

Hermione sat there for a minute thinking, before she got up and began to get dressed. She put on her warmest pair of leggings, something she saved only for the weekends, a long-sleeved shirt and her fleece boots. She pulled on her grey coat and draped her Gryffindor scarf around her shoulders before finally coming out. She had thrown her hair up in a bun on the back of her head without bothering to brush it.

"Do I still look like a mess?" She asked Draco, realizing this was the first time she had ever cared about her appearance in front of him.

"No. You look like Looney. With the leggings and mismatched shirt."

Hermione looked down at her brown and blue owl print leggings and fuchsia shirt. She looked back up at Draco and shrugged. "I'm comfortable." She stated, while also taking in that he was impeccably dressed in black slacks and a grey long-sleeved shirt. He had retrieved his own jacket and left it open over his clothes. There wasn't much snow on the ground yet, but he had opted for boots instead of his dress shoes.

"That's all that matters." Draco told her. "Ready?"

Once outside he gave her half of the stack of toast and they walked around the lake munching their breakfast while enjoying the relative peace and quiet. Distant cheers could be heard from the Quidditch pitch, but neither of them paid it much attention. Eventually they stopped to sit under one of the beech trees. It had already turned orange and gold with the season and about a quarter of the leaves had fallen. A light breeze blew through as they sat among the roots, picking up some of the fallen leaves and blowing them onto the still water of the lake where they dispersed further apart.

Hermione watched them flutter away wishing she could cast away her cares and pain just as easily. She nibbled another piece of toast as they sat in silence for several minutes taking in the fresh air and the sight of the giant squid basking in the bright autumn sunshine.

"You worried me last night." Draco stated. "I've never heard you cry like that before. I've seen you get teary, but…not like last night."

Hermione let out a quiet, sarcastic laugh. Draco had been worried about her? That was interesting.

"Over the years I've taught myself to be stronger than that. To not let my emotions show because they could be used against me. When Harry, Ron, and I were on the run the last year I had to keep them buried so deep and be the strong one. Except for one or two occasions." She turned to him, not surprised to find his grey eyes boring into hers. "I haven't had a cry like that years." She admitted.

"Maybe you need to have them more often. You're allowed to feel, Hermione."

"I know. And I do. Feel, I mean. If I didn't, I could have just told Ron off last night for being an ass and moved on. But so much has happened between us. I thought I knew him better than that. I thought he had more respect for me than that. Maybe he does." Hermione shrugged, stopping there as the next thought she was about to say faded in her mind. "There are days now where I feel I don't know him at all anymore. The war changed us. But I can't pinpoint exactly how it changed Ron. He's still the same to me."

"Maybe that's part of the problem."

Hermione turned to Draco again. "What do you mean?"

"The war didn't affect him the same way it affected you. I mean, hell Hermione, you were tortured."

Hermione felt a pained expression come over her face and she looked back to the lake. "I don't need you to remind me of that, Draco."

"I'm sorry."

And he was. He didn't mean to dredge up bad memories or pain for her. He was trying to make a point, not upset her. "What I'm trying to say is that Ron Weasley has no idea how it feels to be you."

"And you do?" Hermione asked, giving him a pointed look.

"Better than you think. You know what I became, what I had to go through."

She understood what he was getting at. And he was right. If there was someone at Hogwarts now that understood the pain of what she had endured, it was the blonde boy sitting next to her.

"I'm sorry I worried you last night. Everything just…came out. I've kept it bottled up. I'm shocked it took this long for me to finally succumb to it."

Draco felt his hand inch toward hers but pulled it back. They sat in silence for several minutes, listening to the distant cheering and the occasional whistle of wind through the tree branches.

"What did you mean earlier when you said you wouldn't be welcome amongst your own housemates?" Hermione inquired, the thought suddenly coming to mind as she listened to the Quidditch game in the distance.

Draco hesitated. He wasn't in a particularly divulgatory mood. But Hermione had been truthful with him before, and he was hoping she would continue to be honest with him. Trust him enough to feel comfortable talking when she needed to. Although why he felt the sudden urge to be a friend was completely baffling to him. He couldn't deny that her company brought a certain peace to his mind. Or that for some reason he trusted her, knew she would keep his secrets if he asked her to. She was just that kind of person. And part of him wished he had been more like that in past years. But he was being given a second chance now. He knew he shouldn't waste it. He had the opportunity to become a better person, to rebuild his life. Doing it alone wasn't easy. He knew he needed someone to help him, someone that understood him that could be there to back him up when he needed the support.

Draco turned to the witch beside him. "Slytherin House has been less than happy to have me back. The whole school isn't too pleased, but Slytherin more so." Draco stated in a careful tone. "It started last month at the very beginning of term. I wasn't getting the nicest looks from most of my housemates. Then the whispers started. I ignored them because I can let shit like that roll off me. I'm used to being alone, so none of it affected me. But it pissed off at least one seventh year."

"Is that why Rivers attacked you that night?" Hermione asked.

Draco tossed the last bit of his toast into the lake and watched as one lone tentacle appeared and pulled the soggy bread beneath the surface. "Yes." He said on an exhale. "He thought I was acting just like my father, going around behaving as though those beneath me don't exist. I know Rivers, and others whose parents and family ended up in Azkaban after May 2nd, hate me because I'm the closest and easiest thing to place blame on. I know I made bad choices, but at the same I had no choice. If I didn't perform the orders put to me by the Dark Lord, he would have killed me. And my parents. I was too much of a coward, too selfish to save my own skin, to say no."

"You're not a coward, Draco. It takes a lot of bravery to do what you did, to put yourself in those situations because you knew you were saving more than yourself by taking on your father's role."

"I essentially sold my soul to keep my family alive." Draco rubbed absentmindedly at the inside of his left arm and pulled the sleeve of his coat down even further past his wrist.

"That's what I mean. You love your parents enough that you were willing to do whatever it took to protect them. And that's not cowardice."

Draco didn't respond. He was watching Hermione run her palm up and down the inside of her left arm as well over her coat. He wondered if she had seen him do the same just a moment ago, and this was her way of reacting, or responding, to it. He knew what was cut there into her skin. He had stood there and watched it happen. He should have done something that night to protect _her_.

"Thank you for telling me, Draco. For trusting me with that."

He looked up at the muggle-born. "I'm hoping you'll return the favor."

Hermione knew he meant the previous night, and perhaps more. But how much about her and Ron did she want to tell him? It was a sensitive subject right now. She didn't want to think about the things Ron had said, refusing to believe he had meant them the way she interpreted them. Although a voice in the back of her mind told her she had heard everything correctly.

While he enjoyed what they had together, it wasn't enough for him. He wanted more. He wanted what he had had with Lavender. All of it. Now. And he didn't want to wait much longer.

"I really don't know where to start." Hermione looked out over the lake, feeling Draco's eyes on her. She turned and was met with his grey gaze.

"The beginning is usually a good place." He suggested.

"Well, we all know when that was. I suppose the beginning I'm thinking of happened last year, right before Christmas. When we were still hunting Horcruxes and Ron and Harry fought. Ron left that night and didn't come back for weeks. It tore my heart out. I wasn't right for days, but in the end I pulled myself back together and Harry and I kept on. After Ron returned he told me this story of how Dumbledore's Deluminator led him back with this little ball of light that went right through his heart after hearing my voice call his name."

"Was it the truth?"

Hermione shrugged. "I believed him at the time. I still believe him."

"Do you think that was his way of telling you then that he loves you?" Draco asked, his eyes on the ground as he played with some fallen leaves.

"It seemed like it, but I was so angry with him at the time that my mind refused to process that concept."

Draco wondered if she had thought about it afterward and what conclusion she had come to.

They sat in silence again, listening to the continued cheers from the pitch. They had been outside for a little more than an hour now. They couldn't hear the commentary from the game so there was no way of knowing what was happening right now. But neither of them cared.

"Are you going to talk to him about it?" Draco asked, returning to the conversation.

"Not today. I can't even look at him right now. All I'll see is flashes of him with Lavender. Because I know that's what he's thinking about. How much fun he had with her, and why I can't be like that."

"You can't be like that because you're not that kind of girl, Granger. You have more respect for yourself than that. And you know that it's about the journey, not the destination."

"That's very deep, Draco."

"I spent a lot of time with my mother this summer. Mostly just sitting like this." He indicated the space between them. "Although I didn't have a lot to say. And even less than that to my father. She gave me poetry to read, something for my brain to focus on so I wouldn't think too much about everything that happened."

"How is your relationship with you father? It didn't seem too solid in May."

"It's still rocky." Draco admitted. "I can't fault him for some of his choices, because like me he didn't have one at times. And he was only doing what he thought was right to protect his family. But that doesn't put aside the fact that he made me take the Mark when I turned sixteen. Right before he was incarcerated. He knew his sentence was coming, and he knew the Dark Lord was going to find a creative and cruel way to punish him for failing to retrieve that prophecy from the Ministry. My father thought having his son become the youngest Death Eater in the family would win him back some points, but the laugh was on him. Once I had the Mark it gave the Dark Lord free reign to order me to do as he pleased, and reason to kill me should I object or fail."

"What did your mother have to say about that?"

"The night I was made a Death Eater was the first time I ever saw her restrained. My father held her back while the Dark Mark was burned into my skin. And then the night I failed to kill Dumbledore, the task that the Dark Lord gave me…Snape had to hold her back when I was punished. He wasn't even supposed to be on the Astronomy Tower that night. He wasn't part of the plan. He was there out of obligation to my mother and the Unbreakable Vow that he made with her. My mother is never going to forgive my father for the things I suffered because of his failures and bad choices. I don't know if I ever will either. Right now, we're civil with each other. It's not a great relationship. He's my father and I love him, but that doesn't mean I trust him like I once did, or that I want to spend all of my time with him."  
Hermione could understand. Maybe not relate, but she was empathetic enough that she felt what he meant. Conflicted. There was no other word for it. And it was exactly how she felt about Ron now.

Hermione looked across the grounds when she heard a loud cheer erupt from the stadium. "I think the game just ended."

Draco looked across the grounds as well. "Sounds like it. Want to head back in?"

"Yes. I have work I need to finish in the library." Hermione stated as she stood.

Draco stood as well. "Me too. Oh, we have patrolling duty tonight." Hermione gave him a confused look, but then it dawned on her as Draco explained, "For missing last night. I sent McGonagall a note that you weren't feeling well, and she moved our patrol to tonight."

She was touched that he had reached out on her behalf. She had been in no state last night to walk the halls, even though it might have been good for her at the time. Hermione reached down and touched his hand. "Thank you, Draco." She leaned in and kissed his cheek, feeling her own burn as she pressed her lips to his skin.

When she pulled away she noticed that Draco's eyes had widened significantly, and felt a smile form, knowing she had managed to shock him.

They walked in silence as they made their way back to the castle. Hermione thought some more on her relationship with Ron. She knew she wanted to be with him. She had waited long enough for him to realize the same. Now, she began to wonder if that was what either of them truly wanted anymore. It had only been six months since their first kiss. They never discussed exclusivity, not that they needed to, but began referring to each other as boyfriend and girlfriend by default. Hermione felt as though she were being pulled in two opposite directions. Part of her wanted to give her and Ron the chance they deserved, be together the way Ginny and Harry were. She still wanted all her friends in her life, but the other part of her was curious to know what it would be like to live independently of the Golden Trio, to not be labeled as she was. To just be Hermione.

Once back inside the castle they returned to their dorm and gathered their work for Charms and Herbology then went to the library. Hermione was happy to see her favorite table open and walked straight for it. Draco followed shaking his head in amusement. It was an ideal table, he couldn't deny that. Enough space for them to spread out both classes worth of work between them, conveniently located near the book catalogue and one of the windows so there was always plenty of light during the day. It was also tucked back some from the main traffic by the entrance. It wasn't a wonder to understand why Hermione loved this table.

"How do you think you're doing so far this year?" Hermione asked as they sat down and began to pull work out.

"Not bad. Better than I expected in some classes, but it's still early."

"True."

Hermione watched Draco fiddle with his Head Boy badge where he had pinned it to the lapel of the black jacket he had traded for his coat when they stopped by the dorm. She had put hers on as well in case any students sought them out in the library. They were free from tutoring duties this morning, but she wouldn't say no to a student asking for help because of that.

"Can I ask you a question? And you don't have to answer if you think I'm being nosy."

"I think I've been nosy enough with you lately to warrant one question in return."

Hermione stretched her arms out on the table, twirling her quill in one hand, and stared Draco in the eye. "How did you get to be Head Boy, Draco?" She inquired. She was genuinely curious to the circumstance and wanted to know. She hoped Draco would answer.

"Snape mostly." Draco answered honestly. "He had a very long conversation with Dumbledore about me, or so he says. But I think Dumbledore was already considering it as soon as I decided to come back for seventh year. I want to finish this last year properly, so I can go on from Hogwarts to learn more."

Hermione felt both eyebrows raise in shock. She never expected Snape to get involved personally for a student. But it was for a Slytherin student, and it was Draco. So that really shouldn't surprise her that much. But the fact that he wanted to come back and finish his seventh year because he intended to go on to higher learning was the real surprise. She had never thought Draco to be so academically inclined. Yes, he was very studious and did very well in classes, but she hadn't known his desire for knowledge went deeper than that.

"That night on the astronomy tower Dumbledore offered to help me. Protect me, even." Draco continued, fiddling with his quill. It was a nervous habit he had started whenever he spoke about something that unnerved him. "He knew I couldn't kill him. And he was right. I don't have it in me to murder someone. It's wrong. 

“Who I was, the things that I did…They were all wrong. All I want now is the chance to rebuild my life. And Dumbledore knows that, without Snape telling him anything. He knows I can be better, so he's giving me that chance. And I think he also knew that I would have no standing among my fellow students without the title."

"Because the Headmaster chooses the Head Boy and Girl." Hermione stated, and Draco nodded. "And he thought that would give you protection or stature. To show that he trusts you?"

"Essentially. Not that the whole "protection" thing got me very far."

"Nothing else has happened since then?"

Draco shook his head. "No, but I think that has more to do with fear of Snape than any respect for the position Dumbledore offered me. I was shocked when I got the letter. I wasn't going to accept it. I just wanted to come back this year, get through my classes, take my N.E.W.T.s and leave this part of my life behind me. But my mother understands what I'm trying to achieve and made the point that if I returned to Hogwarts as Head Boy and finished my seventh year without incident that it might do me some good, public wise. And it would look good for any University application I send in."

"Out of everything you just said, that shocks me the most."

"That I want to go to University after Hogwarts?"

"Yes. I just can't imagine you doing something like that."

"Why?" Draco leaned in a little, stretching his arms out as well. It didn't escape his notice how close their hands were, but he pretended not to notice. "You think you're the only one with a thirst for magical knowledge deeper than the Black Lake?"

Hermione blushed a little and let a small smile break through. "It impresses me, Draco."

"Wow, now there's a shocker. I've impressed Hermione Granger."

"I think Dumbledore did the right thing." She admitted, gazing across the table at him. "I think you deserve a chance to show that you can be a different person, Draco. A better person."

He didn't say it. He didn't think he needed to. The brush of his fingers against hers on the table was thank you enough.

~~S~~

Hermione took a few days to think over everything in her head about her relationship with Ron, and what Harry and Ginny had given advice on. She eventually reached the decision that if she didn't give her and Ron a true chance to work and figure out what they both wanted she would spend the rest of her life wondering _what if_.

She approached Ron in the Gryffindor common room Wednesday evening. She hadn't spoken to him since Friday night and it had been an awkward few days in class and at meals, but Harry sat with Ron while Ginny kept her company, making sure she finished the food on her plate. She was surprised Ron gave her space to think and didn't try to pester her. She had a feeling that Harry may have been keeping him away while Hermione processed her feelings. She had mostly let The Library Incident, as she called it, go. Ron's words still stung when she thought about them, but she had to put it behind her if they were going to move forward.

"Hey." Hermione greeted Ron, walking up to the couch in front of the fire. "May I sit?" She indicated the space beside him.

Ron looked up at her in surprise from his Transfiguration text. He offered her a small smile and moved over so his girlfriend could sit down. He glanced over at Harry where he sat with Ginny in the back corner playing a game of chess. He gave a slight nod, telling Ron to go on with what they had talked about.

Ron turned to Hermione. She was looking down at where her hands lay folded in her lap. "So, um…about Friday night." He started. Hermione looked up, one eyebrow raised in interest. "I may have said some stupid things."

_That's an understatement_ , Hermione thought. But if this was the best apology she was going to get, she might as well run with it. It might not get any better.

"It's in the past now, Ronald. Let's move on."

Ron gave her a sheepish smile. "I'm glad you're not angry."

"I didn't say I wasn't angry."

His face fell a little. "Um…"

"Look," Hermione cut him off. "We need to talk about us. Privately. We need to figure some things out and decide if this is really…"She let out a breath, choosing her next words carefully. "…what we want."

Ron was in disbelief. Did Hermione want to break up with him just when they were finally starting to get somewhere with each other?

"So…you want to take a break?" Ron asked.

Hermione shook her head. "No. I just think we should talk. But not here. We can go upstairs? Or maybe back to my dorm?"

Ron looked up with a hopeful feeling. Was she serious? _Guess she's not as angry as she said_. He fixed his face, so he didn't look too excited. "Uh…ok, Hermione. We can go back to your dorm."

"Ok. Not tonight, though. I have a lot of homework to get caught up on that's due Friday."

"Ok...What about Saturday? Is Malfoy going in to Hogsmeade?"

Hermione shrugged. "I have no idea. I don't keep track of his social life. But if he's not, we can just sit in my room. The door locks."

"Oh, ok. Um…Saturday is good. Will I see you again before then? I mean, besides classes and meals?"

"Of course. But tonight, I must go. I have patrolling to do as well." She leaned over and kissed his cheek. "I'll see you at breakfast."

Ron watched her go, then turned back to Harry and Ginny. He gave them a look asking if they thought the conversation between him and Hermione had gone well. Ginny rolled her eyes at him and turned back to the chess game. Harry just gave a little shrug with one shoulder. So, neither thought it had gone well.

_Whatever_ , Ron thought as he turned back to the fire. Hermione was speaking to him again and she had agreed for them to go back to her dorm. He felt a satisfied smile stretch his mouth a little, and he opened his Transfiguration book back up to read about Conjuring spells with renewed fervor.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter contains a scene of intense snogging with typical teenage hormones.

"Do I need to vacate the dormitory?" Draco asked Saturday afternoon from where he lounged on the couch.

Hermione had just informed him that Weasley would be coming by so they could talk and would be doing so in her room. Draco's first thought was to be impressed that Granger wanted to bring the Weasel back to her room in the first place. Then he realized the practicality of what she was trying to achieve. They needed privacy, but also uncommon territory. She may have the advantage with it being her room, but she wouldn't use it.

"No, Draco. You can stay. I can even put up a Silencing charm if you want me to."

Draco quirked an eyebrow at her over the top of his Quidditch magazine. "You think it will be necessary?"

Hermione shrugged. "I have no idea. I'm just trying to be prepared in case we start fighting." She sat down on the couch near his feet and let her head fall into her hands.

"The fact that you're already assuming you will is not a good sign."

"I never know what to expect with Ron. One minute he's happy and joking and the next he's grumbling and holding a grudge. I just roll with it, you know?" She looked sideways at him.

Draco lifted one shoulder in a shrug, his eyes back on his magazine. Hermione studied him for a moment. His posture was as relaxed as one would think looking at him. But there was tension in his arm where it rested behind his head as a pillow. His eyebrows were furrowed, like he was concentrating more on his thoughts than the magazine in front of him. And his right foot was twitching where it lay next to her on the couch, a clear sign of nerves or anxiety.

"What are you thinking about?" Hermione asked.

"How shitty the Slytherin Quidditch team did last week. Well, according to those who saw it. But the score was proof enough. 210 to 60. It's painful."

He was lying and Hermione knew it. His voice was too even, too practiced. Like he had been waiting for her to ask her question and he had rehearsed his response in order to have it ready. But it sounded convincing, and that might be enough for someone who hadn't been living with the Slytherin for two months. But Hermione had picked up on Draco's little nuances and she could tell when he was being truthful or just spinning crap.

And right now he was definitely spinning crap.

"How come you don't want to tell me what's bothering you?"

Draco's foot stopped twitching and he looked over the top of his magazine again. "Why would you think something is wrong?"

Hermione gave him a look but let it go. Clearly he wasn't going to talk to her right now. She looked over her shoulder when she heard the knock on the door. "Good luck." Draco wished her as he watched Hermione get off the couch.

She gave him a thankful smile in return. While she walked to the door he disappeared into his room. Just as he settled on to his bed to continue reading he could hear Weasley and Granger moving into her room. Weasley was asking if they were alone.

"Draco is here. He must have gone back into his room. Don't worry about it, Ron. He won't bother us."

" _I_ don't care. But don't you think he will?"

"About what? We're just talking."

Draco smirked to himself as he flipped a page. Apparently the Weasel was expecting something other than talking to happen. He knew that was coming as soon as Granger had told him that the redhead was coming by the dorm today so the two of them could talk.

Draco was tempted to cross the bathroom and put his ear to Granger's door, but he figured she had already put up a Silencing charm. He wasn't trying to be nosy. Well, maybe a little bit. But he did want to hear Granger tell Weasley off should he try anything. It would be only too gratifying.

But Draco sat on his bed for the next ten minutes in complete silence before he gave up on his magazine and grabbed his bag, intent on getting some work done in the library.

# ~S~

Once Hermione had her door shut she cast a Silencing charm around the room. Ron sat on her bed waiting for her to join him. Hermione put her wand on the nightstand and sat down next to her boyfriend.

"What did you want to talk about exactly?" Ron asked first.

"Us. I want to clear the air between us, make sure we want the same things out of this relationship."

Ron shrugged, confused. "Why wouldn't we?"

"It seems to me that we don't, or at least...I don't know. Let me start over."

"What do mean by "clear the air"?" Ron cut in. "Does this have to do with the library?"

Hermione paused, her train of thought broken. He asked the question as though it was a waste of time to even discuss the topic. Hermione was a little taken aback by his tone, but if that was where he wanted to start, she would give him an answer.

Ron was staring at her, waiting. "Yes." She stated. "You made me feel like I'm here just for your convenience. That you're interested in only one thing. Correct me if I'm wrong, Ronald, but I thought we were about more than that."

"We _are_." Ron insisted.

He had thought about what he said last Friday, and was embarrassed that Hermione had heard him. He came to the conclusion that it _had_ sounded like he was only interested in sex. But that wasn't the case. He hadn't thought before speaking, a problem he'd had all his life. His mouth usually blundered forward before his brain finished processing the thought, going with an initial reaction instead of thinking something through. Sometimes it worked in his favor.

This time it had not.

"I know that what I said sounds like I am, but it's not what I meant."

"What _did_ you mean?" Hermione asked, crossing her arms.

Ron was silent for a minute, giving it serious thought. _He_ knew what he had meant. He wanted to spend time with his girlfriend. Yes, he was hoping for a little physical intimacy. He was stressed. He needed something more than just cuddling. But perhaps he should have waited until they were alone before bringing that up.

After another minute passed, Hermione relaxed her posture a bit before speaking quietly, "You really hurt me, Ron."

"I didn't mean to."

Hermione knew that. She could tell when he said something with the intention of insulting someone, or at the very least hurt someone's feelings. But those instances were few and far between as Ron was not that type of person. However, their third year came to mind. They had stopped talking and Ron began to ignore her after their disagreements concerning Crookshanks and Scabbers, and her cat's attempts at killing Ron's pet rat.

He had purposely ignored her on several occasions, speaking and acting as though she were not there, when he clearly knew that she was. She had never felt so heartbroken in her life. Until Friday night.

"I really am sorry, 'Mione." Ron muttered, hanging his head. "I just…didn't think."

Hermione was silent. She didn't know what to say. She wasn't going to tell him that it was ok, because it wasn't. But that didn't mean she liked the fact that he felt bad over it. He had admitted something that, maybe, was true. She knew Ron Weasley had a bad habit of sticking his foot in his mouth. Over the years she was able to look past it. But this time she couldn't. It was too personal.

"I don't know what to say, Ron." Hermione whispered. "But this is why I wanted to talk to you. I want to know that what we have right now is good enough for you. And that you're willing to take it slow with me. I don't want to move too fast. I want to cherish each moment and not miss anything."

Ron turned to her laying his hand over Hermione's. "I want that, Hermione, I promise I do. But what's wrong with a little more?"

"Nothing. I'm willing to do more. But I want us to agree on a pace. There are days when you're willing to slow down for me, but then others where you want to jump into bed. We need to find some middle ground, Ron."

Ron leaned in, threading his fingers with hers. "I can find some middle ground with you, Hermione." He offered genuinely. He reached up with his other hand to brush some of her curls over her shoulder. His fingers traced along her jaw until he reached her mouth. He leaned in a little more and pressed his lips lightly against hers then pulled back.

Hermione almost giggled at the sheepish expression on his face. Was he actually nervous? She offered Ron a reassuring smile and leaned in this time kissing him. Ron was happy to return it. He deepened the kiss at the first opportunity, drawing Hermione down on to the bed with him so they lay side by side.

He pulled her in close and snogged her until air became a necessity. The he went right back to the snogging. Hermione seemed at ease, responding to him in a way that he liked. So he pulled her closer. Within a few minutes they had moved so that they lay parallel with the bed, Hermione on her back against the blanket with Ron perched above her.

He was still moving a little too fast for her, but she knew that if she didn't at least try she would never become comfortable with any new forms of intimacy between them. So she let her mind drift off. She let Ron take the reins this time. It would be her turn next time to call the shots.

# ~S~

Ron made a concentrated effort following that Saturday afternoon to take what he and Hermione talked about to heart. He responded more so with words than actions when they were together and learned to interpret the way she squeezed his hand as a signal to slow down. He noticed that she was doing her best to be with him as much as she could. Hermione made time at night during the week when she wasn't on the schedule to patrol and he didn't have Quidditch practice. She and Ron spent time in his dorm, or hers on the weekends. They talked, kissed, and touched on occasion. They found a good track to stay on.

Hermione's only complaint as the days went on was that Ron no longer seemed very interested in the same level of physical intimacy they had engaged in before. He was better with her, patient like he had been in the past. And while their emotional connection grew, flourished even, their relationship growth seemed stunted. She asked Ron about it one night after they had finished their Herbology homework and were sitting in front of the fire. She reached over taking his hand and drew it in to her lap. Ron made a motion like he wanted to pull back, but he let Hermione keep hold of his hand.

"How come you don't want to be closer anymore?" Hermione asked, turning her head to look at him.

Ron was staring deep into the fire and at first she thought he hadn't heard her. Then he shrugged. A very tiny movement she would have missed if she had not been watching him. "What do you mean? We're close right now."

"I mean more like this." Hermione whispered, and she reached their hands over to rest in his lap. Ron let go of her and shifted a little. Hermione drew her hand back. 

"Is it because we're in public?"

"No." Ron answered, turning to her. His mouth lifted in one corner with a half-smile. "It's not that, Hermione. But you are the one who wanted to find a slower pace. I'm waiting for you to tell me you're ready for more."

"Ok. Is this not enough?" She asked, placing her hand back in his lap, threading their fingers together.

Ron smirked and drew their hands down. Hermione tensed a little, only because they were in view of others, but not directly. She let Ron guide her hand for a moment. He sighed through his nose and then let her hand go.

"It's enough." Ron whispered. He leaned over and kissed her cheek. "Thank you,"

Hermione leaned up against his side and laid her head on his shoulder, snuggling into him as his arm reached across her shoulders drawing her closer.

She wasn't completely convinced. She knew he wanted more. Not that she didn't appreciate him taking this seriously. But Ron was male, and she had lived with both him and Harry in close quarters for almost a year. She had heard the conversations between them about sex, at least what Ron had divulged. And it was all based on things he had heard from his brothers. This was the fact that led Hermione to believe that Ron and Lavender had never slept together, but that didn't mean they hadn't done other things.

The longer this went on, the more Hermione began to think that she was missing something. She had already spoken to both Ginny and Harry about Ron. She knew exactly what they would say if she went to them again. She needed to talk to someone else. Someone on the outside that would be able to help her understand.

Hermione hated the idea, but she knew she had to talk to Draco. He was the only other person she could think of that might have an idea, or even just a suggestion. She had considered it once before, but at the time she couldn't trust him with something this personal. She still didn't know that she could. But at least his opinion would be honest. Most likely brutal. But honest and, she was hoping, informative.

# ~S~

Ron had Quidditch practice and she and Draco were off from patrol duty the following evening. She walked back and forth between her door and Draco's at least a dozen times before she finally worked up the nerve to knock on it. It was ajar and she could see him reclined on his bed practicing today's Charms lesson, attempting to complete the spell nonverbally as he flicked his wand at the empty glass in his left hand, presumably trying to fill it with water.

He had already removed his robes and tie and had the first few buttons of his white shirt undone. He leaned back on his bed adding to the air of nonchalance, his legs stretched out in front of him.

She couldn't deny that he had grown into a very nice looking young man. There was a hint of muscle on his lean frame. His grey eyes were no longer harsh and judging, but soft and bright with amusement. She liked that he parted his white-blonde hair to the side instead of slicking it back, or letting long bags fall over his forehead as he had done when he was younger. Both styles had made him look too much like the spoiled brat he had been. Growing up she had never considered him attractive, her opinion tainted by his arrogant, bullying nature. Looking at him now she thought he was handsome. But Hermione would never actually tell Draco that. And besides, she liked Ron's red hair and freckles just fine.

"Having trouble?" Hermione asked, pushing the door open when he didn't respond to the knock.

Draco looked up, not having heard her. "With spellcasting? No. Getting my wand to respond to me?" Draco swirled his hawthorne wand in a small circle at the glass casting non-verbally. Nothing happened. He spoke the spell, " _Aguamenti_." The glass filled instantly.

Hermione walked in and sat on the edge of the bed. "How many months has it been?"

"About eight, since Potter forced it out of my hand."

"Do you look at it differently now?"

Draco felt an eyebrow quirk. "How do you mean?"

Hermione nodded at the wand in his hand. "Knowing that this is the wand that destroyed Voldemort?"

Draco considered it. "Not really, but I certainly have a new respect for it, knowing what it's capable of."

"Maybe it needs to learn to trust you again. I mean, you didn't win it back from Harry, he dropped it and you picked it up. Then you handed it back to him. Maybe it needs to know that you won't give it up again so willingly. That it's safe with you."

"Perhaps." Draco put his wand down on his nightstand and leaned back again crossing his arms over his chest. "So, what's on your mind, Granger?"

"I wanted to talk to you about something. I have a sort of…favor to ask." She said slowly, trying to pick her words carefully. "It's sensitive and…embarrassing." Hermione twisted her hands where they lay folded in her lap.

He shook his head at her when she dropped her eyes for a moment. Granger was a bundle of nerves over this. No way was she going to loosen up and say whatever it was on her mind with that much tension rolling through her. He was intrigued that she had come to him in the first place, for whatever reason, and wanted to hear what she had to ask him. He had a feeling he knew what it was, but he wanted to hear her say it.

"Let's sit on the couch." Draco offered just as Hermione opened her mouth to start speaking.

She snapped it shut into a frown, but got up and followed Draco from his room as he led the way out. He reclined on the couch, setting his feet up on the coffee table, crossing his arms once more. Hermione sat beside him, still tense but not as much now that they were sitting in neutral territory. Her back was still too straight and her hands folded too perfectly to be considered relaxed.

"What's the favor you want to ask of me, Granger?"

Hermione let out a breath wondering if this was such a good idea after all. Draco knew about the difficulties between her and Ron, but not the intimate details. She didn't how much of that she wanted to divulge. If any at all. Those specifics were not his business, but they would give context to what she wanted to ask him.

"I've been trying with Ron. To do things I know he wants, things that I know I'm comfortable doing with him. But he…he doesn't seem to want me to reciprocate when we're together."

"He gets you off but doesn't want anything in return?"

Hermione blushed. She had known going into this that Draco would be blunt, but she still wasn't entirely prepared for it. "Not even that. We hardly do much of anything anymore."

"How long has this been going on?" Draco asked, turning to face her.

"Since the beginning of the month. You were here that day I asked him to come by and talk. I don't know how long you stuck around for, but we did a few things."

Draco smirked. He had left intentionally figuring that that would happen between Granger and Weasley as soon as they went into her room.

"I wanted to ask you if have any advice for me. Maybe something I could do or try. Something I haven't done yet."

"Why me?"

"Because you're male. You might have some tips for me."

"Why don't you just ask Potter? He's Weasley's best friend. Or even his sister?"

"I have already, and they both gave me different advice. Harry told me not to give in to everything Ron wants right away, but to reinforce the importance of us building our relationship and taking it slow. Ginny told me that if I feel comfortable doing something with him to just go for it." Hermione shrugged. "Both were useful so far. But now it feels like we've hit another impasse."

Draco considered her for a moment. She was being truthful, at least so much in wanting to know how to please Weasley. But there was more beneath the surface. More that she wasn't letting on about. Something that she had wanted to ask both Potter and his girlfriend, but was too embarrassed to admit. "Ask me what you really want to, Granger."

She took a deep breath and stared Draco in the eye. If she was going to be serious about keeping her relationship with Ron moving forward she was going to have to bite the bullet and swallow her pride. "Will you teach me what boys like? All the nuances?"

Draco folded his arms again, continuing to assess her. "Have you slept with a wizard before?"

"No." Hermione let out a breath of air as she said it, feeling her cheeks heat with embarrassment.

Both of his eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Bloody hell, Granger. You're a virgin? I thought you slept with Krum in fourth year."

"Not even close." Hermione shook her head. "We fooled around a little, but we never slept together. He was my first kiss."

"I _knew_ you snogged him!" Draco exclaimed, delighted with the revelation. "What else did you do?"

"I'm not telling you!"

"You just told me you're a virgin. What could be worse than that?"

"Thanks, Draco." Hermione snapped sarcastically. "We…touched." She finally admitted after a few moments silence passed.

"Over or under your clothes?"

"Mostly over, sometimes under."

Draco wanted to ask if she had managed to make the Bulgarian Quidditch star come, and if he had returned the favor, but he figured Granger was embarrassed enough already. No need to make it worse and potentially cause her to clam up completely.

"Does Weasley know you're a virgin?"

"No." Hermione shook her head again, her eyes staring at something over his shoulder. "At least I don't think he does. I let him draw his own conclusion. If I had to guess, I would say that he thinks I am."

"You know you don't have to do anything with him that you don't want to. I've said that before."

"I know. But I _do_ want to. I want to make him happy. I guess…" Hermione paused and thought for a moment. It dawned on her that the reason she was so uncomfortable with Ron in the past was because he seemed so familiar with what he was doing, and it was all new to her. "I guess I just don't like that he knows more about this than I do."

"Ah, the crux of the matter. There's a subject that Weasley is more knowledgeable than you in. Is that what's making you uncomfortable around him? Your inexperience? Or is it something else?"

"My inexperience." Hermione answered after a few moments silent pondering. "It makes me hesitant. He's used to a certain way, and I don't want to disappoint him. I feel like that's the reason he hasn't wanted much intimacy between us lately. If we're in the middle of...whatever...and I ask him to slow down because I want to know what he's doing, and what to expect, he just stops completely. And after several times of that happening, almost everything has halted between us."

"If he's expecting you to act like Lavender Brown than he's a moron. We've gone over this already, too, Granger. You know you're not like that. _I_ know you're not like that. Just watching those two go at it like they did in sixth year made me want to vomit." Draco scowled as the image came to mind.

Hermione smiled. She had felt the same every time Lavender put on a show. Acting the part of the besotted girlfriend, clinging to Ron as though her life depended on it. She had been honest, though, in her public displays of affection for Ron. She was obviously dedicated to him. But so was Hermione. She had always been dedicated to Ron, first as her friend, and now as her boyfriend. She was willing to do whatever she had to do to make him happy. But was that the right course of action?

They dove into this relationship so quickly without truly discussing it. They went from fighting side by side as friends to being with each other exclusively in the span of one evening. Had that happened too fast? Should they have spent the summer more casually with each other, building up the new relationship between them instead of using it as a crutch as they both healed from their emotional wounds? Hermione knew there had been times when she should have sought out Ron's company instead of trying to deal with her pain alone, but she hadn't wanted Ron to see her like that.

"What do you suggest I do?" She asked, coming out of her thoughts.

"What exactly is the problem that you're having?" Draco queried back. "Other than the fact that you feel your current knowledge is lacking?"

"That _is_ my problem. I need to learn how."

"How to…what?" Draco shrugged in question. "How to touch a guy? I would think that's obvious. We're easy." _Well, I am_. Draco thought, smirking to himself.

"It's not that obvious to me." Hermione muttered.

"So, are you asking me to teach you how you to wank Weasley? Give him a blowjob?"

Hermione blushed scarlet. Yes, she wanted to know those things. She had already attempted them with Ron, but he found her skill lacking. Even said so, although not in those words precisely. But it had been weeks since they engaged in anything even remotely close to that level of intimacy with each other. This was just another field where books could not actually teach her everything she needed to know. Practical application was necessary for advancement. She wanted to be able to surprise Ron in ways he wasn't expecting. But did she really want Draco Malfoy as her tutor for such an education? Or should she just go back to Ron and tell him she was ready to do whatever he wanted?

"Granger, I told you before, you shouldn't just give in to Weasley because he wants something from you." Draco stated, making Hermione suddenly look up at him.

_Did I ask that out loud? Draco does have a point, though. And Harry said the same thing. So, what am I supposed to do? I want things to work with Ron. I want to be able to be with him and not feel afraid of the unknown. We should be discovering these things together. It shouldn't be one-sided._

They sat in silence for a couple minutes, Draco watching as Hermione processed whatever was going on inside her head. He'd meant what he said about her not giving in because Weasley wanted it. Granger was the kind of girl you took your time with. He had learned enough from his own experiences to know that. She was the kind of girl that wanted slow touches, not groping.

Draco's mother had raised him to treat the opposite sex with respect. He had never paid much attention to it until the last couple of years. The war had changed how he viewed people. As a child, he had idolized his father and the connections that he had within the Ministry. He thought if he acted the same way he would grow up to lead a similar life. That image had tantalized him in his youth, influencing the way he thought and treated others, shaping him into the arrogant prat that he had been.

Now he realized that none of that mattered. Voldemort hadn't cared if you were rich, or that your blood purity went back to centuries. Draco had witnessed him torture, even murder, for something as small as not answering a direct question. He had seen enough cruelty as a Death Eater to last him the rest of his life. He did not want to see any more.

He glanced at Hermione, looking her up and down. She still sat perfectly straight, hands folded in her lap and one ankle tucked behind the other. Her posture reminded him of his mother. Hermione Granger was not a wanton woman. On the surface, at least. She was respectable and knew how to act with proper decorum when necessary. But he could tell, under the right circumstances, she could be driven crazy.

_You would like to see her lost in the throes of ecstasy, wouldn't you? Watch her become unhinged because of the things you could do to her?_

The thought enticed Draco. He glanced at Granger. She was looking everywhere in the room except at him. He took a moment to study her. Nothing had really changed in the years he had known the muggle-born witch. Her hair was still a riotous mess of curls that she barely kept restrained except when necessary. But he had longed for a time to bury his hands in them. To know if they were as soft as they looked. He had harbored secret feelings of affection for her in their first years of school together. He never admitted it to anyone. Not even his mother. He was too embarrassed by the fact that he actually liked Hermione Granger. And that had pissed him off.

Hence why he treated her with such disdain. Teased and tormented her. He couldn't cope with the fact that a muggle-born was better than him, and that he actually admired her for it. What angered him more was that in Fourth year when he saw her enter the Yule Ball on Krum's arm he knew then that he had never seen a more attractive witch. He had been so entranced by her that he couldn't think of a single insult to throw at her as she floated past him in her turquoise robes. His feelings had diminished over time, but he still admired her. Still thought she was attractive in her own way.

She had skin as fair as his own when it wasn't sun-kissed. There was a smattering of freckles across her cheeks and nose, light enough to go unnoticed by someone who didn't know they were there. When she smiled he could tell if it was genuine or if she was putting on a show. But when it was real, her smile was brilliant. Her whole face lit up and her eyes sparkled. Those honey brown eyes that could be both warm and calculating at the same time.

A thought came to Draco's mind then. Something he had caught himself thinking of more and more frequently, fantasizing about even, since the day they had walked around the lake and she kissed him on the cheek. An itch he had been wanting to scratch for weeks, but tamped down because he knew it was never likely to happen. But here was his opportunity.

He would find a way to justify it later.

"When was the last time you had a good snog?" Draco asked, breaking himself out of his thoughts.

Hermione's head swiveled so fast he was afraid for a moment that she would give herself whiplash.

"Excuse me?"

"I only ask because you can't seem to relax, Granger. When was the last time Weasley seriously snogged you?"

The question was a test, he reasoned. He wanted to see her reaction. It would tell him how serious she was about this, about asking for his help. He expected her to huff at him. Get up without a word and effectively end the conversation like it never happened and then tell him tomorrow morning to just forget the whole thing. It wouldn't get him to his goal, and he wasn't trying to be obvious. That would be completely counterproductive and _guarantee_ that she would get up in a huff and storm off.

But she didn't. To his surprise, Hermione didn't get up and leave. She watched him for a moment, narrowing her eyes slightly. She then softened her features and dropped her eyes back to her lap. "It's been a while."

"Clearly," Draco grinned at her. "Was it at least good?"

Hermione didn't answer.

"So, it wasn't good."

She sighed, frustrated that Draco could read her so easily. "I don't like feeling as though I'm about to choke on his tongue. He's always in a rush and it's usually very sloppy."

Draco laughed this time, but not at her. He was laughing at Weasley and his obvious lack of grace. "Is that how he always kisses you?"

Hermione sighed, looking away from him. But she nodded her head in answer. _At least when he did kiss me like that._

"He probably still considers this a game. But you don't. To you this is serious. You want to spend the rest of your life with him."

"Is it a game to _you_?"

Drag shrugged one shoulder, "Depends on the witch and what she's into and looking for in a relationship. If she's serious, then so am I. If she's just looking for a good time, I'll provide it."

"So you still play the field?"

"I haven't been with anyone since last year." He offered her a half smile. "And before that I only dated a handful of girls."

"So you're saying that your experience is limited."

"Not that limited. Remember, I was a Death Eater." Draco leaned forward, his hand clasped as memories began to creep to the front of his mind. "There were certain…rituals that were performed. My mother refused the Dark Lord when he tried to force me to participate. I thought he was going to kill both of us. But instead he made me watch." Draco turned to her, "He made me watch everything."

Hermione hadn't known that. She wanted to ask what "everything" was, but she had a pretty good idea. And Draco didn't look like he wanted to go into detail about it.  
He shook the dark thoughts off, turning his mind back to Granger and filling it with his fantasy instead of the images that had been surfacing just moments ago. "You need a good snog, Granger." He blurted out, going for it this time.

"And what exactly do you mean by that?" Hermione challenged, surprising him with her snarky tone. He liked it. Hermione had no idea what Draco's definition of a good snog was. If it was anything like the way Ron kissed her then she didn't know why Draco thought she was in need. Ron kissed well enough. _When_ they kissed now.

"I think if you're serious about asking me for help, that it's a good place to start. Give me an idea of what I'm working with."

"What you're working with?" Hermione thought for a moment. "How exactly do you plan to "teach" me?"

He lifted an eyebrow, giving her a look. _Really, Granger_? "How do you think?"

"Draco, I can't kiss you. Or touch you for that matter. I'm dating, Ron."

"Then how do you expect to learn anything? Besides, do you plan on telling him how you learned to suck dick if he asks you?"

"No."

"Then what's the problem?" Draco asked, sitting back against the couch again.

"Just because I would never say anything, hypothetically speaking should we do this, and that's not me saying yes, doesn't make it right."

"And yet despite these protests, you're considering it." Draco could tell from her body language. She may still be sitting up straight, but he saw the way she tried to discreetly rub her thighs together underneath her skirt when he mentioned sucking dick. Or the flush that was spreading from her cheeks down her neck and into the collar of her white shirt. She was considering it because it was an opportunity for her to _learn_. And Hermione Granger never turned that down.

But she was also curious, and obviously aroused. Two things that sometimes went very well together. Or at least they would in this case if she decided to go through with this.

"You should let me snog you, Granger. If you don't like it, then we don't have to go any further. We can pretend this conversation never happened. And you can go on to figure things out with Weasley in your own way. I won't proposition you again."

"I don't know. It doesn't feel right." Hermione was making excuses and she knew it. _Draco wouldn't be offering if he didn't want to kiss you._

This thought surprised her. She would have assumed Draco coming from one the purest blood families would never want to lay a finger on her. She remembered some of the things he used to say to her when they were younger, specifically him calling her a mudblood.

"Granger, you ok?" Draco asked as he watched her rub at the inside of her left forearm. She looked up at him, obviously coming out of some deep thought. She looked down at her hand and quickly removed it from her arm, like she hadn't known it was there.

His mind conjured the memory of that night. He had watched his aunt perform the Cruciatus curse on the muggle-born girl in front of him. Watched Bellatrix cut the letters into her arm while Hermione lay screaming and flailing on his sitting room floor. And he had stood there, his father watching proudly from behind him, holding him still with one hand on his shoulder so he couldn't run. It had been worse than when he was forced to torture Rowle on Voldemort's orders.

Draco felt a knot form in his stomach and a wave of sickness washed over him as the memory of the Death Eater twitching and writhing on the floor replayed in his mind. He looked up at Hermione. She was staring at her hands where they lay folded in her lap once more. She took a breath in and let it out slowly.

"Granger, I won't make you if you don't want to." _Weasley has no idea what he's doing to her._

"I do," Hermione whispered, lifting her eyes to his. _Oh Gods, what am I thinking?_

Draco paused. Her answer had come so quickly. He stared at her for a moment until the shock of her response faded away. Then he felt the corner of his mouth pull up into a small smile. He sat up and shifted down the couch so that he was sitting next to her.

"You need to relax a little first, Granger." He told her, reaching for her hands. He was surprised when she let him unfold them from her lap. He moved a little closer to her, watching as her breathing sped up. "Relax, Granger." He repeated softly.

"I'm sorry. I just don't understand why."

Draco sat back a little. "Why what?"

"Why you want to do this. I mean, don't you still think…?"

Draco shook his head, knowing what she was asking. "No. Not after everything I've seen."

"You _really_ want to do this?"

He smirked. She was confused, and obviously nervous. It wasn't in his nature to be comforting. At the same time, he knew he shouldn't answer her question by just going for it and start snogging her. _That's probably what Weasley does, and why she doesn't like his technique._

Draco answered instead by moving just a little closer to her. He reached out with both hands and cupped her face. Hermione gasped quietly, not sure what to think, or even do for that matter. Draco Malfoy was touching her! Dear Merlin, he's about to snog me, too! Hermione balled her hands into fists as Draco leaned in to her. Every muscle in her body tensed up, ready to uncoil in defense or flight if it came to that.

Draco noticed this as he moved closer and hesitated. He really didn't want to feel her fist in his face again. Third year had been more than enough. He slowed down even more, and ran his fingers along her hairline at the base of her neck, massaging gently with the tips. He felt and saw some of the tension leave her, and she sighed.

Hermione closed her eyes, waiting for the pressure of his lips on hers. But it didn't come. Instead he kissed her jaw lightly. Moving his mouth slowly toward hers. But he passed over her lips and kissed the other side of her jaw. She could feel her heart racing, feel quick breaths escaping through her nose. One hand left her face and she felt Draco uncurling her fist to place her hand on his waist. She pulled away when she realized where she was touching him, but he took her hand again and put it back.

He let his own fall to her hip and began drawing little circles over the material of her skirt. Hermione let another sigh escape her, then Draco's mouth was on hers kissing her softly. Her other hand uncurled and she reached out to hold him with both now. Draco smiled against her lips, letting his other hand fall to her shoulder. The one on her hip continued to draw circles with a light touch.

Hermione tried to breath, and when she opened her mouth Draco began to kiss her a little deeper. She started to protest a little but he moved slowly. He wasn't in a rush to get to her tonsils the way Ron always was. She let him continue. His tongue stroked over hers tasting the inside of her mouth. She heard a little whimper escape her and felt her hands bunching the material of Draco's shirt before releasing it to slide to his back.

There was no reason why kissing Malfoy should feel so good. Not with the history between them and their respective friends. But it _didToo good_ , her mind whispered to her. He was slow and gentle with her. As if he knew this was exactly what she needed. And it was. He knew she was tentative about this, about any form of physical contact. She didn’t like people getting too close. Even those she knew and trusted. Not after what happened to her. 

Hermione was too guarded, always had been. She liked the feeling of control it gave her over her emotions. She always had her armor in place in the form of a logical, or calculated comment. She knew it made her come off as cold or standoffish sometimes, but it was the only way she knew to protect herself. 

But here was Draco Malfoy, finding the tiniest hole in her shield, and breaking right through it. _Because he knows how it feels. He knows what it’s like to seek solitude from everyone around you, when in reality all you want is to be held and touched. To be told that everything will be ok. He understands_ , Hermione told herself, _in a way that Ron never will. Draco understands because he was put through the same hell._

“You still with me, Granger?” Draco asked, pulling back when the pressure of her lips against his ceased for a moment. 

Hermione opened her eyes slowly, taking in his dark grey ones. He gazed at her with a look of concern. He was already starting to lean back in to her as she nodded her head. He smiled just before touching his lips to hers again. Draco waited for her to respond before going further. He ran his tongue along the seam of her lips, willing her to open up to him again. The hand on her shoulder slipped down a bit to hold her arm, and his fingers stroked over the thin material of her white uniform shirt.

He hummed into her mouth encouragingly then began to lean back until he was lying on the couch with Hermione perched above him. She settled herself between his knees shocking him with how relaxed she was now. Draco ran both of his hands back through her hair and began to kiss her a little harder. She responded to him eagerly. He felt his chest rumble with a quiet laugh. Granger, it turned out, was exceptionally good at snogging.

She moved her hands from his back to his chest and was petting him now through the thin material of his shirt. He couldn't help the reaction that his body had to the attention. He honestly tried to stifle the moan that rose out of him but failed. His pants were beginning to feel too tight as all the blood in his body rushed south into his dick. He wasn't embarrassed, but he didn't know how Granger would react to it. He was tempted to take her hand and press it against his crotch just to see what she would do, but he wasn't in the mood to have his bollocks hexed off.

Thus, it shocked him when Granger tried to get even closer to him. They snogged frantically now, lips and teeth clashing as they chased each other back and forth, desperate to maintain the connection. Hermione's hip bone dug into his and Draco felt her stocking-clad thigh rub his erection. He moaned again, louder this time, and she jerked back. The kiss abruptly over.

All trace of excitement was gone from her. She scooted away from him on the couch and buried her face in her hands.

"I'm sorry. I can't do this, Draco. Any of it." She looked up at him, her cheeks bright pink. "Let's just forget this ever happened. Like you said. I-I'll figure this out with Ron in my own way." She stood up and straightened her skirt then walked toward her room, seemingly oblivious to the fact that he was still lying on his back on the couch, legs splayed, and with a very obvious bulge in his trousers. She turned at her door, her eyes resolutely on his. "Thank you for listening. I'll see you in the morning." She gave him a small smile and disappeared behind her door.

Draco grunted and thumped his head on the arm of the couch, his eyes rolling up to the ceiling. _Well, this certainly is not the way I had imagined that kiss ending_. He reached down and squeezed his cock to relieve the pressure a little, just until he could get into his room and finish off. He hadn't expected to react to Granger like this. He hadn't expected her to be into the kiss as much as she had been either. Her reaction to him was an interesting revelation. One he would continue to think about and play out in his mind to a more satisfying ending.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do I agree with Hermione kissing Draco while she is dating Ron? Not entirely. But I think it’s going to add some interesting drama.


	7. Chapter 7

The next morning Hermione rose extra early and was out of the dorm before Malfoy even started to make noise in his room. Their kiss from the previous night continued to replay inside her head, tormenting her. She had liked it. Far more than she anticipated. There was no denying how good it made her feel. But that in turn made her feel guilty, and there was no way she was going to admit to Draco any of this. He would be only too satisfied with her reaction. She would just leave it alone like they had agreed upon and figure things out with Ron on her own.

She just couldn't be near her dormmate lest he see the emotions in her eyes.

Hermione could deal with the taunting and teasing, but not one of Draco's satisfied smirks knowing that he had gotten under her skin. And in a very intimate way. So, she went along with the option they had discussed last night. Pretend it never happened.

She didn't want to consider it as avoiding Draco. But she did intentionally look the other way at meals when he walked into the Great Hall throughout the following week and visited Gryffindor Tower almost every night. She did her best not to think about Malfoy. However, when Ron's attention was diverted from her she found her mind drifting back to the previous Friday and the way Draco's lips had felt against hers. His slow process of drawing out the actual kiss, and then the buildup that caused her to almost lose control. He had held her close, almost like he was afraid to let her go. As if he needed her touch as much as she needed his in that moment.

Hermione knew afterward that Ron would never be able to kiss her like that, with the emotion Draco had shown. She wondered if the Slytherin had been aware of just how much he had exposed to her that night. It was part of the reason why she ran, other than the obvious effect their kiss had had on him. But she was willing to try some of the technique Draco had used on her with how she approached Ron, hoping he would be receptive to it. Ron still clung to his new habit of not venturing into too much physical intimacy, and Hermione thought he may be using the tactic to intentionally drive her crazy and make her beg for it, but Ron wouldn't do that.

Once she dismissed that thought, another one began to niggle at her mind. Hermione didn't want to consider it, but she couldn't get it to go away either. It had been creeping up on her the past few weeks and she tried her best to beat it down, tell herself Ron would never. But the more she thought about it the more it began to consume her thoughts.

By the last weekend in November she had become so distracted that she realized she hadn't given Draco Malfoy a second thought in days. Hermione didn't know which was worse. The fact that she thought Ron may be cheating on her, or that she had stopped thinking about Draco.

Both left her feeling equally guilty and sick inside.

It wasn't a sensation she was used to. Guilt, yes. She knew what guilt felt like. But not this twisted, knotted, upset feeling in the pit of her stomach. Not this confusion over how it felt to kiss Ron the way Draco had kissed her. And only because she liked it. Hermione knew she should have never agreed to try. She knew she should have stopped the conversation the moment Draco asked her when the last time was that Ron kissed her.

She had been caught up in the way Draco looked at her. Like she was something he craved. Hermione had not even seen Ron look at her like that. And for whatever reason, she was drawn to Draco in that moment. Curious to know if he actual felt that way. She knew there were parts of him that had changed. She had seen them. She trusted him now. At least with some things.

It boggled her mind that Draco Malfoy _wanted_ to kiss her. And she let him. For a few moments she was allowed everything go. Let all her pain, her fears and her regrets fade to the back of her mind. Her sole focus became the young man beneath her and the way he was making her feel. At the same time her mind was screaming at her that what she was doing was wrong. She shouldn't be kissing Malfoy.

But it was just a kiss, right?

Nothing exclusive. No strings attached.

He hadn't asked her to sleep with him, or even to dump Ron. Draco had even said that if she didn't like it they would stop, and he would never bring it up again. Hermione was able to justify her own curiosity upon hearing that. She trusted Draco in that moment to keep to his word. Maybe it was the way he regarded her, or the way he spoke to her. Slow and intentional. The same as the way he kissed her. He took his time. He didn't kiss her full on the mouth right away. He built up to it.

He touched her first, reminding her that he was right there beside her. It made her feel safe. More so, it made her feel desired. She wasn't unaccustomed to the sensation. Ron made her feel desired. Krum had even made her feel desired at the young age of fifteen. But not like the way Draco made her feel for those few, brief minutes.

He lit a fire under her skin that she had never known before. And she loved it. Wanted more of it. Hermione would have been only too willing to keep going. But then the haze in her mind had lifted when Draco moaned, and she became aware of his erection against her thigh. Draco had been aroused. But by a reaction to her specifically, or because of the act they had been performing? She didn't know.

Hermione's brain halted, and she pulled back. Draco didn't follow her. He didn't ask questions. He just let her go. True to his word. And she had left him there lying on the couch, hair tousled, shirt wrinkled, and sporting an impressive bulge in his trousers. Hermione wouldn't be surprised if Draco hated her now because of it. Maybe it was good that she was keeping away from him after all. The entire situation was embarrassing, and she didn't want to think about it anymore.

# ~S~

Draco was very amused during the weeks following his intentional/unintentional snog with Granger. He knew right away the following morning that she was avoiding him. She was already gone when he woke up and not in the Great Hall when he went down for breakfast. He found her later in the morning, hiding behind a stack of books in the library, staunchly refusing to look in his direction.

This was only the beginning. As the days progressed toward the end of the month he noticed that she did not inhabit the common room, opting to shut herself in her bedroom instead after patrol duty. He suspected that Granger may also have been hiding in Gryffindor Tower when she wasn't in the dorm on other nights.

If this was true, Draco was very surprised. Granger wasn't the type to run and hide with her tail between her legs. Then again, she could be following through on her intention of trying to work things out with Weasley. But judging from her reaction to their kiss and the way she ended it so abruptly, he doubted that was the case. She was embarrassed.

Draco wanted to entertain the idea that she had liked his kiss. He certainly had enjoyed her technique if the erection he was sporting by the end was any indication. The witch felt good in his arms. Too damn good. More than he had ever expected. But Hermione was not his to chase. He could lust after her and fantasize about her, but he couldn't have her. The taste he had gotten Friday night was the most he would ever get. And Draco would just have to be satisfied with that.

Except part of him wasn't. He wanted more. He wanted to hear her shout his name as she came undone underneath him. To watch her fall apart as he teased her toward climax. He could only imagine what she would look like.

_No, stop it, you prat._ Draco told himself. _Granger may talk openly with you. Even treat you like a friend. But that doesn't mean you are, and that doesn't mean she likes you. She's a kind and intelligent person that understands the definition of the word_ respect.

Draco couldn't leave it there. He, too, was curious by nature. And although Hermione may act on the surface as though their kiss had not affected her, Draco knew better. She was as affected, if not more so, by it than he was. And he needed to see it. He needed to know.

Draco found an opportunity the following night in the library while performing his tutoring duties. Of all the things the Head Boy and Girl were responsible for, this was his least favorite task. But he still did it. And at least the third year Hufflepuffs he was assisting tonight were working on Potions. His gaze kept wandering over to Granger. She was working with Ginny Weasley, going over Arithmancy judging from the books open in front of them. They were having an intense conversation, and he couldn't tell if it was about the subject, or something else.

Draco watched Hermione get up and wander over to the shelves. Just then one of the Hufflepuffs at his table stated she needed a book for her Shrinking Solution essay. Draco offered to get it under the guise of requiring a book himself. He left the third years at the table and got up to follow Granger. After collecting the books he was supposed to be retrieving he searched the Arithmancy aisles until he found Hermione. She was bent over one of the ledges flipping through a text. She shook her head and put it back then pulled down the next one.

Draco positioned himself against the ledge behind him and set his books down. He leaned back, crossing his arms over his chest as he watched her. Hermione finished going through the text and added the book to the other two she had already pulled down and turned to go.

Except she wasn't expecting Draco Malfoy to be standing there behind her, his eyes watching her with an amused smirk on his face.

"Merlin, you scared me." Hermione hissed at him, nearly dropping her books.

"I think that's the first time I've ever heard you swear, Granger. I like it."

Hermione rolled her eyes but didn't leave. She didn't know why she was still standing there. The whole point of staying away from someone was not to loiter in a library aisle with the individual. But Draco had her fixed with his gaze.

"Did you need something, Draco? I'm a little busy just now."

Draco was silent for a moment, letting her take in the smirk on his face. "How are things with Weasley?"

"That's none of your business."

"You sort of made it my business when you asked me for help. I'm not trying to be nosy. Just asking a question."

_Sure you are,_ Hermione thought. "I really don't want to talk about it, Draco. But if you must know things are fine." She clutched the books in her hands to her chest, crossing her arms over them.

"So, our snog helped?"

Hermione really didn't want to think about that right now. She had been doing well the last couple of days, not letting her mind wander. But now that Draco had brought it up, she felt a wave of sensations wash over her.

"Have you been thinking about it all? Because I have." Draco let that sink in with her for a beat before adding, "A lot."

Hermione wasn't going to give him the satisfaction. Draco was just trying to get a rise out of her. She wasn't going to succumb to it. He was being his usual, arrogant self. Overly satisfied thinking that he was making her squirm. Well, he was making her squirm, but Hermione wasn't going to let Draco see it.

"No." She said firmly, staring him down. "And even if I had I wouldn't tell you." She did her best to fight back the traitor blush that she could feel creeping into her cheeks but failed.

Draco's smirk grew wider at the pinking of her cheeks and he gave her a knowing look. He pushed off the ledge and took a few steps closer to Hermione, perching one hand on his hip. "You're trying to tell me that you weren't affected by it at all?"

"I was not." Hermione knew her voice sounded less than convincing, but she put as much force into it as she could. It was hard to think when Draco was that close to her, smelling as good as he had that night. She felt her eyes close.

"I don't believe you." Draco whispered, dropping his voice low.

Hermione huffed and turned away from him, so he wouldn't see her blush deepen. _It's just from how angry he's making me. Not because his kiss got me hot and bothered and I haven't been able to stop thinking about it since._

"I think you're lying, Granger." Draco said quietly.

"And I think you're a prat, Malfoy." She retorted, her back still to him.

"Ooohh…last name. So, is the fact that you liked my kiss the reason you've been avoiding me?"

Hermione spun back around. "I never said I liked it. And I have not been avoiding you." She insisted, which is exactly what she had been doing, even though she didn't like it. It made her look like a coward. And she was not a coward. She was just having some trouble getting her head straight, and she had to be away from Malfoy to do that. "I've been busy."

"Busy hiding. It's ok, you can admit that you liked it. I know you did. I know I did."

"Are you sure it wasn't just an act, Draco? Because it wouldn't be the first time I've seen you fake it."

She left it at that and turned to go, walking away as fast as she could. _Damn him!_ She cursed internally.

Ginny could tell something was up with her best friend when Hermione finally returned from getting the books they needed. She was pink in the face and could barely concentrate on the work in front of them. It hadn't escaped her notice that Draco came out of the stacks only moments behind her, looking awfully smug as he glanced at Hermione when he passed the table. And Ginny noticed over the next hour the he continued to look in their direction, his eyes on Hermione every time.

_Interesting,_ she thought to herself. _Now they're getting under each other's skin. Perhaps Draco knows how to be a human-being after all._

Hermione refused to acknowledge him when he walked by on his way out of the library. But she did look up when his back was to them. And her eyes remained glued to his retreating form until the Slytherin was out of sight.

"Everything ok?" Ginny asked.

Hermione blinked and looked back down to her homework. "Fine. So…um…tell me again which equation was giving you trouble."

Ginny stifled a giggle but pushed her notebook over and pointed with her quill to the last equation they had been working on. "Even though you're dating my brother, it's ok to look and admit you find other guys attractive, Hermione. I was always looking at Harry no matter who else I was dating at the time." Ginny looked over her shoulder and then back to her friend, leaning in to whisper, "And Draco is not a bad choice for eye-candy. I'll even admit that he's very good looking." Ginny sat back in her seat with a grin, watching as Hermione's blush turned Gryffindor scarlet.

# ~S~

November passed in a blast of cold wind and several snowfalls. By the beginning of December, the entire student body was ready for the holiday break. The first Saturday of the month was the second Gryffindor match of the year, this time against Ravenclaw. Hermione turned up wearing her scarf and waving a scarlet flag as she cheered the team on with the rest of her house. They won, but only by a hair, as the score had been tied when Harry spotted the snitch. Ravenclaw was inches away from grabbing it when Harry dived in from out of nowhere and snatched the little gold ball just as the Ravenclaw Seeker was stretching out his hand. Ron was still ecstatic over the victory, even though he had let six goals in.

Hermione asked him if he wanted to come back to her dorm after and he jumped at the opportunity. Ron showered quickly, leaving his dirty Quidditch robes in the bathroom. He dressed in jeans and a t-shirt and made his way out of Gryffindor tower with a little difficulty as they crowd kept trying to pull him in to the impromptu party.

Ginny came to his rescue, throwing him a wink across the room as she grabbed Harry and pulled him in for a kiss. To say his best friend looked shocked was an understatement. The whole room erupted in a loud cheer, and Ron took the opportunity to sneak out. He didn't like having to watch his little sister snog his best friend, but he would thank her later regardless for the diversion.

He made it down to the third floor in record time, his steps quick and his heart light. As he turned down the corridor toward the Head dormitory, he saw Malfoy walking in the opposite direction, his bag slung over his shoulder. Ron was thankful that the Ferret was making himself scarce. He still didn't like the fact that Hermione had to share a dorm with him.

Ron knocked on the door behind the tapestry as he always did. It opened a moment later to reveal Hermione still wearing the same clothes she had had on at the match. She smiled brilliantly at him and moved to the side to let him in. She made sure the door locked behind him and they retreated to her room.

"That was an excellent game today." Hermione praised as she shut and locked her door then cast a Silencing charm around the room. Just in case Draco decided to come back early from the library.

"It was. I really thought Ravenclaw had it for a moment. But then Harry flew in out of nowhere like that." Ron dove his hand and made a flying sound effect. "Bloody brilliant move."

"It was," Hermione agreed. "But you had some brilliant moves of your own today."

Ron leaned in with a smile and kissed her. It was a sweet kiss, but a little rough as he began nipping at her bottom lip. Hermione let him continue, kissing him back. When he licked along the seam of her mouth she opened up to him letting Ron deepen the kiss. He drew her down to the bed with him, moving his mouth to her neck. This was a spot Hermione enjoyed. She was particularly sensitive just below her ear, which was where Ron sucked gently now.

She sighed and tangled her fingers in his hair, pulling gently to encourage him. Ron smiled against her skin before pulling back.

"Want to try and go a little further today?" He asked in a soft voice.

"How so?" Hermione wanted to, after weeks of almost nothing between them, but she didn't want to jump into something they hadn't done yet.

Ron ran his hand up and down her side, pausing at her waist on the next the down stroke. He slipped his fingers under the hem of her t-shirt, moving them slowly back up her side, skin to skin. Hermione trembled a little as he ghosted them over her abdomen, then continued to move up until he grazed the underside of her breast through her bra.

"This would be easier if you let me take your shirt off." Ron suggested.

"Ok." Hermione heard herself whisper it, but she wasn't sure if she was entirely ok with it. She had never been shirtless in front of Ron before. What if he didn't like what he saw? She sat up and pulled off her jumper first.

Ron reached for the hem of her shirt and began to lift it slowly. Hermione raised her arms and let him pull it off. She could feel tremors passing through her as Ron tossed the shirt to floor and turned back to her.

"Hermione? What…what is this?" He asked, reaching out to the scar across her chest. He didn't touch it. He pulled his hand back instead, looking up to her.

"It's from the curse that Dolohov cast that night in the Department of Mysteries. You know about it."

"I know. But seeing it is different than just knowing about it. I had no idea…"

Hermione suddenly felt too exposed and she crossed her arms over chest. Ron reached out and pulled them down. "Hey, don't hide. I don't mind."

"Are you sure?"

She watched Ron's eyes look back to the scar, and then back up to her. "I'm sure."

But Hermione wasn't.

Ron leaned in and began to kiss her again, pinning her back down to the bed. He covered her body with his own, effectively blocking them both from seeing the scar. Hermione tried to get back into the same headspace she had been in only minutes ago. But her mind could only conjure Ron's face when he first saw the scar. He had grimaced. And not because he felt bad about what happened to her.

As they continued to snog, she noticed that Ron was no longer touching her. His hands remained firmly planted beside her head, never shifting. He kissed her on her mouth over and over, kissed her neck and shoulder, but never ventured further down than that. Hermione quickly grew uncomfortable and started to try and shift out from underneath him. She wanted to put her shirt back on, then perhaps they could go back to the passion that had been building between them before Ron wanted to undress her.

"What's wrong?" He asked as Hermione wiggled underneath him.

"Um…I just…I want to get up." She answered. "I want my shirt. I…I'm cold."

Ron pulled back and got off the bed. He picked up her shirt and handed it to her. "You're still not ready are you?" He asked.

"I am. It's just cold in here." Hermione insisted, pulling her shirt over her head.

Ron watched her. Watched the scar disappear beneath the burgundy material. He tried to pretend that just because he couldn't see it any more that it wasn't there. But he couldn't. He had known of course that Hermione had the scar. She had talked about it in the past. But until now he had never seen it. He hadn't known the extent of it. And it wasn't something small like the scar on her neck. It stretched across her chest in a jagged line of raised skin, the color slightly paler then Hermione's own complexion.

And the sight of it scared him. He didn't like it.

"Maybe we should just stop." He said. "I'm actually starting to feel pretty tired. I think I'm going to head back to dormitory and take a nap."

"You can take a nap here, with me." Hermione suggested.

"No. It's ok. I'll see you tomorrow." He leaned down and kissed her forehead. "Thanks for coming to the game this morning."

Hermione sat there stunned as she watched him leave. Part of her wanted to get up and chase after him. But she felt frozen to her bed. She couldn't move. Was Ron really leaving because he was tired? Or had that been some excuse so he could escape? Was he really that bothered by her scar? She wasn't lying when she told him she was ready. If she wasn't she would have never let him take her shirt off in the first place.

Hermione laid down on her bed curling into a ball. She knew she should feel upset. Even cry a little over what just happened. Any other girl would react that way. But she wasn't upset. She was confused. She knew Ron was lying about being tired. Which meant that his excuse had been just that.

But Hermione didn't want to go back down that road. She had already wandered it too much in the last few weeks. And every time she went down it, it only made her heart ache more. Because it meant she didn't trust her own boyfriend. Someone she had known for over seven years. Someone she had been through a war with. She trusted Ron with her life. And for the last year she had trusted him with her heart.

But now she wasn't so sure she could anymore.

# ~S~

The next couple of weeks progressed at a snail's pace as the Christmas holiday loomed closer. The anticipation of having an entire week off was so thick among the student body one could practically taste it in the air. Or perhaps that was just the effect of the smells coming from the kitchen. Hermione was back on speaking terms with Draco, not as uncomfortable in his presence anymore since she had had her say in the library.

That and her mind was too preoccupied with work and worrying about her relationship with Ron to bother thinking about her fellow Head in any other capacity than that. She had been going to Gryffindor Tower almost every night to see Ron and spend time with him, except when he had Quidditch practice. On the nights that he didn't they would sit together and study, or cuddle on the couch in front of the fire and talk quietly. They didn't snog again, in fact, Ron seemed completely disinterested in anything physical that went beyond sitting next to her with his arm around her shoulders.

Hermione noticed that whenever she walked into the common room, Lavender Brown would fix her with an angry stare. She would follow Hermione as she walked over to Ron and sat beside him. Her expression would then morph into one of complete rage and Hermione thought she even saw Lavender shaking one night she appeared so upset.

But why should she be?

Hermione had a feeling why. But she didn't want to accuse Ron of something she knew he would never do. Because either she would be right, and her relationship with him would be over. Or she would be wrong and look like a fool. But the more she lingered on it, and the longer she and Ron continued with their limited interactions, the more she needed to know for sure.

The week before break, she and Ron were finishing up an essay for Transfiguration together in the common room. Hermione looked over her shoulder and sure enough Lavender was glaring at her and Ron from the other side of the room.

Hermione huffed a sigh and turned back to her work. Ron looked up, knowing that tone of frustration.

"What's wrong, 'Mione?"

"Behind us." She whispered.

Ron looked past her shoulder at Lavender, feeling a smirk form on his face at the other girl's reaction.

"Why are you smiling about it?" Hermione asked.

Ron looked back to her. "Because it's funny. She's jealous."

Hermione set her quill down. "Why would she have any reason to be jealous, Ron?"

"Because she still wants me. A lot of girls do."

"What is _that_ supposed to mean?" Hermione whispered.

"Nothing." Ron shrugged. "Just saying."

"Why?"

"Does it matter? It doesn't mean anything."

"Then why say it?"

"I don't know, Hermione. Look, just forget it."

Ron let his head fall into his hand as he picked his quill back up and began writing. His gaze drifted over her shoulder to look at Lavender again. She was still glaring at them, more specifically at Hermione. Ron tried to give her a look telling her to knock it off. But she just continued to stare.

Hermione noticed his expression and she glanced back again. Apparently Harry and Ginny had noticed as well, sitting only a few feet from them on the floor by the fire playing chess. Ginny quirked her eyebrow and nodded at her brother. Hermione had expressed her concern to Ginny a few days ago that she was worried Ron may be cheating on her. Ginny couldn't believe her brother capable of it either but told Hermione that if it was bothering her that much, she needed to talk to Ron about it.  
Hermione turned back to her boyfriend. He was focusing on his essay again.

"Can we step outside for a minute?" She asked.

"Why?"

"I just want to talk to you about something. But not in here."

Ron set his quill down, happy for any excuse to put his homework off, even if only for a few minutes. "Let's take a walk actually. It's still early."

"Good idea."

Ginny gave her an encouraging smile as they walked out.

"Where are they going?" Harry asked, his eyes on the retreating forms of his friends.

"For a walk." Ginny answered, then ordered her remaining knight into a position so she could capture Harry's bishop.

"Damn, I needed him. A walk to do what?"

"Talk, obviously."

"About her?" Harry nodded at Lavender Brown in the corner. Ginny turned to look at the Gryffindor over her shoulder. "You know the only reason she came back this year was because of Ron."

"I know."

"You don't think he…" Harry started to say. Then he shook his head.

"That's exactly what Hermione is worried about."

"I have a feeling their walk is not going to end well."

Ginny reached over and took her boyfriend's hand. "Me, too. But what can we do? We're stuck in the position of observers. It's not our place to get involved."

"I hate it."

"As do I, Harry. But there's a lot between them they need to work out. And as much as I don't like thinking about it…" She looked back to Lavender again and then returned her gaze to Harry once more, "Sometimes I believe that Ron could do it. And only because he doesn't think first. You and I both know how irrational he can be."

Harry sighed heavily and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I hate to admit it, but I agree with you."

Ginny patted his hand. She then got up and moved to sit beside him, both of their backs against the front of the couch. They sat like that until Ron returned to the common room alone about forty minutes later.

# ~S~

Ron followed Hermione out of the portrait hole, his mind feeling more at ease now that he wasn't trying to dredge up facts on Conjuring spells that he didn't understand. Hermione walked beside him, arms crossed over her chest and her eyes on the floor.

"So, what did you want to talk about?" Ron asked as they turned out of the corridor and down a staircase.

"How come you haven't wanted to do anything lately?"

Ron shrugged, sticking his hands in his pockets to keep them warm. "Just tired, I guess. I'm sorry if it's been bothering you. We'll have all of Christmas break to spend time together."

"Yeah…"

"That doesn't sound very enthusiastic." Ron stopped and touched her arm as they reached the landing. "What's really bothering you?"

"I just…" She closed her eyes. It was now or never. She didn't want to spend her Christmas break brooding over this. If she was wrong, she was wrong. She would deal with that after. "Ron, are you seeing anyone else?"

Complete silence followed her question. He stared at her, dumbstruck. His reaction had been almost immediate.

"What?"

"I asked you if you're seeing anyone else right now."

"Are you mental?"

Hermione was taken aback by his tone. It was angry, although he didn't look angry, or hurt. He looked confused.

"It's a fair question, Ron. You've been very distant with me the last couple of weeks. And every time I see her, Lavender Brown looks put out. Jealous. Why would she have reason to feel that way? Or look at me with…with contempt?"

"I don't know, Hermione. Maybe because she's hung up on sixth year."

"Still? After all this time? A little dramatic, even for her. Don't you think?"

"You really believe I would cheat on you?"

Hermione threw her hands up. "I don't know what to believe anymore, Ron. We don't really talk much. And when we do we always end up arguing or one of us walks out."

"I don't really know what else you expect if you're going to keep picking petty fights with me."

"Petty? You think I'm being petty?"

"I think you're trying to find a way of hiding behind excuses for why you don't want to sleep with me."

Hermione stopped what she was about to say in return. Instead, she took a breath and swallowed back the tears that welled in her eyes with his retort. "We're going to come back to this? Is that really so important to you?"

"It's part of a normal relationship, Hermione.

"You mean like the one you had with Lavender Brown?" Hermione snapped back.

"Or you and Viktor Krum?" Ron countered. "Don't deny it. I already know he was your first snog. What else happened between you two that you won't tell me?"

"I want to know how far you went with Lavender."

"Why do you care?"

"Why do you care about what I did with Viktor?"

"Because it would explain why you're such a bloody prude with me."

Hermione gasped. But she stood her ground. She wouldn't let Ron see how much he was hurting her right now. "Tell me you're not sleeping with Lavender and I'll answer your question."

"Hermione, don't go there. You know you don't want to."

"Is that your answer?"

"Bloody hell. I can't do this with you tonight, Hermione. Next thing you're going to mention Malfoy and I just don't want to hear it."

"Why the hell would you bring Draco into this?"

"Because you've been so chummy with him recently."

"And?" She asked. She wished Ron would think through what he said before opening his mouth sometimes and provide context instead of spewing words at her. "He's my dormmate. Am I not allowed to be nice to him?"

"It's _Malfoy._ How can you want to be nice to him?" Ron wondered, not understanding how she could possibly be friendly with the blond git.

"The war changed us all, Ron." Hermione reminded him.

"Yeah, I think that's pretty obvious." Ron muttered, looking her up and down.

She took a step back from him, her mouth hanging open in shock. "Why are you being like this?"

"Why do you have to ask about Lavender?"

"Are you avoiding my question because you're hiding something?"

"Fuck this." Ron spat out. He marched past Hermione and back up the stairs without looking back at her.

# ~S~

Hermione didn't speak to or look at Ron for the whole of the following week. She couldn't. She was partially still in shock from their fight. But she was also mentally dissecting the entire conversation. At first she thought she was wrong to push him so much about Lavender. But then she decided no, she was right to ask him. It _had_ been a fair question after she gave her reasons for it. And his question about Viktor had been equally fair. She just hadn't been expecting it and didn't know how to respond to it in a way that wouldn't hurt Ron.

He was right, though. Sex was part of a normal relationship. And they did talk about it. Just because they didn't yet engage didn't mean they weren't normal. That what they had was wrong because they weren't physical with each other in that way. Ginny and Harry hadn't even slept together yet. And she had had _that_ conversation with Harry months ago. Only recently had Ginny admitted to her that they were still waiting.

Hermione wanted to fix things with Ron before Christmas break. She didn't want to stay at the castle by herself. She wanted to spend the holiday with everyone that she loved. Even more so because they had missed last Christmas together. Hermione sighed, pulling her knees up to her chest and wrapping her arms around them as she continued to stare into the fire. She had been sitting on the couch in the Head common room every night since she and Ron fought. And every night Draco asked her if she was ok.

And every night she ignored him.

# ~S~

Ron was livid at his girlfriend for her accusation. But he was even angrier with himself. He should never have blown up on her like he did. He just didn't have a good answer where it concerned Lavender. He had no idea why she regarded Hermione with jealousy and contempt. The only thing that had happened between them was a brief snog, and that had been back in October. It no was reason for his ex-girlfriend to act the wounded victim.

Ron had immediately, well almost immediately, pushed her away and told her he couldn't do it. The only reason he let Lavender pull him into a dark corner was because he was still coasting his high from that first Quidditch game, and he wasn't thinking. For a moment he imagined he was kissing Hermione, and then Lavender had grabbed his ass, and he realized what he was doing. He had pulled away from her and told her no. Maybe he shouldn't have left her in the corner, but he didn't know any other way to make his answer sink in with her.

The problem he was having now was that he caught himself thinking about that kiss, and the way Lavender manhandled him. She was always like that. Very handsy and grabby. At first, when they began dating in Sixth year, Ron wasn't too crazy about it. But she had been his first real experience, and he figured the more they did stuff the more comfortable he would become with it. And he had. He enjoyed it. Her touch was deliberate and intentional, and she never left him wanting for more.

After she told him what she liked in return there was no stopping the interactions between them. At least until she became too clingy. Then the act got old fast. He had started looking for reasons to avoid her and wound up giving in more than he probably should have just to get her to stop nagging him sometimes.

All of that combined with what he had with Hermione, and their conversation from a few weeks made him stop and consider. Did he want the same things Hermione did?

Yes.

Maybe.

He wanted to be with her. But that was a given, right? That wasn't part of the problem. The problem was that Hermione wanted to move at a different pace. She wanted to take things slow. As far as Ron knew, he was her first real boyfriend. She had only snogged Krum. Although after their fight he knew they had done more. What exactly and how much was still a mystery. But Hermione had her reasons for not telling him. Probably the same reason she had never told Ron Krum had been her first kiss. She didn't want to hurt him, or she just didn't want to share. It was her personal business.

But they were girlfriend and boyfriend. They were supposed to share their personal business with each other. Only, Hermione didn't want to share. She didn't want to be too exposed with him. She was scared or shy. Or both. Ron just didn't understand _why_. Then again, he had never asked either.

Maybe they just needed some time apart to think.

Hermione rose from the couch to go down to dinner on the last evening before Christmas break. She assumed she would be eating in silence again, as Ron hadn't spoken a word to her at any meal since the previous week. Thus, she was surprised when she sat down at the table, then he turned to her and asked her if they could take a walk again after dinner.

They didn't converse much throughout the meal, instead giving each other sideways glances. They both left before dessert was served and were among the first to leave the Hall. They walked in the direction of the library since the corridors on the way were most likely to be empty.

"I've thought a lot about last week." Ron admitted as they walked on.

"Me, too." Hermione responded. "I'm really sorry."

"So am I. We both said a lot of things. And a lot of it needed to be said. But I think you were right about some of what you said a few weeks ago. And I wanted to suggest…I think we should take a break. For a few weeks. Just spend some time thinking about what we both want."

Hermione came to a complete standstill. "What?"

"We both need some time to breathe, 'Mione. It's been a stressful term for both of us. With classes and studying. Your responsibility as Head Girl and me with Quidditch. I think taking a break would do us both some good."

"I...Are you serious?"

Ron nodded slowly. "I wanted to say something before we left tomorrow."

Hermione was flabbergasted. "How does that make any sense, though, Ron? You realize how awkward Christmas with your family is going to be now? When we show up not together."

"No one needs to know."

She hung her head for a moment as she pinched the bridge of her nose to staunch her tears. "I think Ginny and Harry will notice faster than you think when I stop coming by Gryffindor Tower."

Ron gave her a confused look. "Why would you stop coming by? I didn't say we had to stop being friends. Just that we won't be exclusive."

"Do you really think I was visiting the common room to do my homework with you?" Hermione asked, looking back up at him. "No, Ron. I come by just to be with you. Getting work done, too, is nice. But I like sitting in front of the fire with you, with our friends. That to me is normal. What I feel with you when we're together like that is like a breath of fresh air to me."

"Hermione, I…I'm sorry. I didn't know."

"Because you never ask." Hermione whispered, doing her damnedest now to fight back the tears in her eyes. How could he do this tonight of all nights? She started to walk away, but Ron reached out and grabbed her hand, trying to stop her. "Don't." She begged, pulling her hand away. "Just don't." And she continued back down the corridor, determined not to cry. Not this time. Because this time it would break her. And she was already broken enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m not trying to Ron bash. Please don’t think that I am. I am just of the opinion that Hermione and Ron are not good together as a couple. I personally do not feel that they fit well together. They make better friends than lovers. Also, I do not believe that Ron would intentionally cheat on Hermione (at least not in this story – not true for my others). But that doesn’t necessarily mean that he wouldn’t think about getting back together with her at some point down the road.

**Author's Note:**

> Canonically, there is no Heads’ dormitory. I would like to think if there were, the Head Boy and Girl are given the choice to share the Heads’ dorm together or stay in their respective Houses for the year. Draco and Hermione, I think, would both want a place they can run to if they need to be alone. A place that is just theirs, and cannot be intruded upon, even by each other. Because doors lock and their both adults. 
> 
> Draco was at Hogwarts for most of his 7th year. But he never finished it. I do not consider the characters returning to Hogwarts in their “8th” year. Hermione, Ron, and Harry missed their 7th year completely. So, they are all repeating it, and the same goes for Draco, as he missed part of his. Why is he even returning to Hogwarts in the first place? Because he wants to start a better life for himself, and he must begin from the bottom. With everyone he knew growing up and showing them that he has changed. Because they are ones he will be interacting with (most of the time) for the rest of his life, and influencing him.


End file.
